Friday, May 8, 2026

Craving for nirvana is obstacle to it?


Behind the scenes look | Panaprium
(One Timeless Witness) He meditated for 20 years [seeking moksha or liberation] then the Buddha said "stop," an apocryphal tale to make a point.

Bhava-taṇhā is "craving for becoming," grasping leading to "clinging" (upādāna), which inevitably results in disappointment, dissatisfaction, misery, suffering...not getting what one wants, getting what one doesn't want, all of which is dukkha.

Bhava-taṇhā ("craving for being" or "craving for becoming") [5], craving to be or  become something, to unite with an experience [16].

This is ego-related, states Buddhist scholar Peter Harvey, the eternal seeking of certain identity and desire for a certain type of rebirth [5].

This last donut will fulfill and satisfy me!
Other scholars explain that this type of craving is driven by the wrong view of Eternalism (eternal life, the idea that the soul never dies because something always survives, as if consciousness unchanged carries on, not realizing that what carries on through this "wandering on" or saṃsāra is an impersonal process clung to as "self" -- not an eternal soul, not an independent ego, not something personal, not a "self" or "soul" -- without actually living up to the definition of "self or soul" we assume) and about permanence [4, 17]. More

How to reach enlightenment here and now
Dhr. Seven, Amber Larson, Ananda (DBM), COMMENTARY FOR WISDOM QUARTERLY

What is the true nature of all things, of all phenomena? They are (1) impermanent, (2) unsatisfactory, and (3) impersonal (not-self).

But it is foolish to assume that this "impermanence" is eventual. It is in fact radical! From moment to moment, things do not stand. They constantly fall away. They are always arising, turning, and passing not only at every moment but at every sub-moment.

In a "moment," such as a citta or "mind-moment," there are three phases: (1) arising, (2) turning, (3) passing. The exact same thing is true of physical particles, kalapas.

This impermanence goes by so quickly that it is not possible to see directly, but there's a trick. The arising and falling away is recorded by the mind and can be reviewed (replayed) in slow-motion to observe the process.
  • One would learn this in a monastery  that knew what it was doing -- such as those in the lineage of the great Pa Auk Sayadaw -- from a long line of practical advice handed down from accomplished teachers to students. So far as we can determine, it is not recorded in the texts, either discourses or commentaries. This seems to be the case with the practical application of many of the teachings mentioned in the Pali canon sutras. The Path of Purification is a compendium of Buddhist meditation practices, and some things are explained there. But it is so dense, in addition to being awkward in translation, that good luck making sense of it.
This is what we do not understand, what we do not directly know-and-see, until we develop the path of purification and dispassionately look on at all phenomena (as explained in detail in "The Four Foundations of Mindfulness Discourse" or Satipatthana Sutta).

When we are finally able to see things (cittas and kalapas, mind-moments and material particles) behaving as they have always behaved when we were blind to and deluded about what was really there all along, the mind/heart automatically lets go. There is no effort to do so. Seeing their true nature, we stop clinging.

Furthermore, when we see that all things are utterly incapable of ever fulfilling, satisfying, or doing anything but being ultimately disappointing, we stop craving, stop expecting any new thing to be any different.

Moreover, when we finally know-and-see as it truly is that what we thought (assumed) was personal and self is not, what in the universe (with three spheres of sensual, fine material, and immaterial worlds -- with "heavenly" places in each) is there to cling to?

Why have we been holding on to suffering (dukkha, this unsteady, askew cartwheel making the road so bumpy and painful) and to things always hurtling towards destruction? It is exactly because we did not see, did not know.

I get it! Now I know and see!!
And now are we undeceived, having seen things as they really are and always have been, there is no "effort" to let go. Letting go happens naturally and one knows-and-sees the ultimate, nirvana. This process is "awakening" (bodhi, enlightenment).

Then it is as if everything -- all ignorance and darkness -- dissolves (nirodha), and light arises, and there is awakening out of painful ignorance to ultimate unending bliss. This is the bliss of nirvana, the highest happiness and peace. There is no use in describing it, but it can be directly experienced here and now, free of concepts and views.
at No comments:

Disenchanted w/ mundane world: Beth Upton

Disenchantment with the Mundane World: Conversation with former Theravada Buddhist nun

Disenchantment: Untold Tales
(The Theory of Samsara) Jan. 8, 2026: In this in-depth conversation on Ultimate Meaning: The Theory of Samsara, I speak with British Buddhist meditation teacher Beth Upton, a former fully ordained Theravāda Buddhist nun (Sayalay Anuttara) in Burma who spent nearly ten years training under Pa Auk Sayadaw (Ven. Bhaddanta Āciṇṇa) in the Burmese forest meditation tradition.
 
She shares her journey from ordination at age 25, through years of rigorous monastic training in calm-and-insight (samatha-vipassanā), to her decision to disrobe and teach as a lay practitioner in the West.

Together, we explore some of the most misunderstood questions in contemporary Buddhism, including:
  • Let go until success then go teach the world.
    What truly leads someone to renounce samsaric life
  • Disenchantment vs. curiosity on the path to liberation
  • Whether Buddhist enlightenment is possible for lay Buddhist practitioners
  • The lived meaning of renunciation beyond philosophy
  • Tranquility versus insight (samatha vs. vipassanā) — and why “vipassanā” is often a misused term
  • Ultimate reality, momentariness (moment-to-moment presence), and non-self
  • Why deep meditation can feel fragile outside the context of monastic life
  • The role of community, wise friends, and authentic teachers
  • Commercialization of Dharma vs. teaching by donation
  • Sectarianism between Theravāda, Mahāyāna, and Tibetan Vajrayana Buddhism
  • Why liberation is not just for “other cultures” or monastics

Canadian interviewer Lama Choga
This dialogue is not about spiritual abstract beliefs or spiritual ideals, but about what actually works when confronting disappointment (dukkha, suffering), impermanence, and the [impersonal] realities of samsara in modern life.

Chapters/Timestamps
  • 00:00 – Intro: Beth Upton and Path [to End] Samsara
  • 02:18 – Why she chose ordination as a British Buddhist nun at age 25
  • 05:10 – Meeting authentic Buddhist teachers and the power of sangha [community]
  • 08:32 – Experimenting with life and early renunciation
  • 12:45 – Discovering liberation as a real possibility
  • 16:40 – Is enlightenment possible for lay practitioners?
  • 19:55 – Stream entry, arahantship, and Theravāda views
  • 24:10 – Did Beth Upton meet enlightened beings?
  • 27:05 – Why she disrobed after 10 years as a forest nun
  • 33:40 – Fragility of meditation outside monastic life
  • 37:55 – Teaching the Dharma authentically in the West
  • 41:50 – Disenchantment with samsara: knowing it in the bones
  • 47:30 – Cycles of renunciation and returning to the world
  • 52:15 – Creating long-term retreat communities in Europe
  • 56:40 – Teaching by donation rather than selling the Dharma
  • 1:01:30 – Can deep meditation be practiced while working?
  • 1:06:55 – Permanent retreatants and Western monastic models
  • 1:10:40 – Environmental ethics in Buddhist practice
  • 1:15:25 – Sectarianism: Southeast Asian Theravāda vs. Tibetan [Vajrayana] Buddhism
  • 1:21:10 – Personal liberation vs. compassion for all beings
  • 1:26:30 – Shamatha vs. vipassanā: clearing the confusion
  • 1:33:10 – Ultimate reality and momentariness explained
  • 1:39:45 – Causality, impermanence, and non-self
  • 1:45:20 – Reflexive awareness and observing mind moments
  • 1:52:10 – How to find wise friends and authentic teachers
  • 1:57:30 – Final advice for Western practitioners
  • 2:00:10 – Closing reflections and future conversations
Lama Choga and a Canadian Buddhist Sangha
If serious about meditation, renunciation, and understanding liberation beyond romantic [New Age] spirituality, this conversation offers rare clarity and lived insight.

🙏 Keep wise friends. Beth Upton's YouTube channel: @beth.upton.meditation
How this was made: Auto-dubbed. Audio tracks for some languages were automatically generated. #DharmaTalk #Samsara #Buddhism #Theravada #Vipassana #MeditationPractice #Renunciation #Liberation #Enlightenment #BuddhistNun #PaAuk #NonSelf #FourNobleTruths #EightfoldPath #SpiritualPractice #Mindfulness #Jhanna #EasternPhilosophy #ultimatemeaning
at No comments:

Gender? Tara, the most powerful Goddess?


Tara (Sanskrit तारा, tārā, Standard Tibetan སྒྲོལ་མ, dölma), Ārya Tārā ("Noble Tara") is also known as Jetsün Dölma (Tibetan rje btsun sgrol ma, "Venerable Mother of Liberation"). She is an important female buddha in Vajrayana and Mahayana Buddhism.
  • The Elevation of Mary Magdalene
    Our reading of Mahayana Buddhism, of which Vajrayana is a sub-school, suggests that the MOST powerful Buddhist goddess is actually Kwan Yin (Guanyin, a female manifestation of Avalokiteśvara) Bodhisattva. She is queen or in any case certainly the most powerful, for she looks on and hears the cries of the world with utmost compassion, a kind of Virg Yin Mary (not Jewish or Essene Miriam so much as the ultimate goddess in Gnostic Christianity, Mary Magdalene).
  • If Theravada Buddhism made much of personifying qualities through transcendent goddesses (devis), our vote for the Ultimate Goddess right alongside Kwan Yin (Guanyin) would certainly be the glorious Prajnaparamita of Java, Gnostic Sophia, the personification of the Perfection of Wisdom. And we wouldn't stop there. Maha Pajapati Gotami, Yasodhara (aka Bimba Devi, Rahulamata, Bhaddha Kaccana, Sundari Kaccana, etc.), Khema Theri, Uppalavanna Theri, and Queen of [Tusita] Heaven Maya would serve as the raw basis for building up goddesses, venerable enlightened Buddhist women in history.
  • [Earlier traditions hold to the view, one of five niyamas, that while females are of course equally capable of arahantship, full enlightenment, as well as many other accomplishments, literal buddhas only arise as males. Why this would be, or why any of the niyamas are true in and of themselves, is not explained. 5. dhamma-niyāma "the constraint of dhammas (things, phenomena)," namely, such events as the quaking of the 10,000 world-systems at the conception of a bodhisatta conception in his mother's womb and again at his birth (partition from that womb). At the end of the discussion Sumaṅgalavilāsinī passage, the Commentary states that dhamma-niyāma explains the term dhammatā in the text of the Mahāpadāna Sutta (DN ii.12) (Cf. S 12.20 for a discussion of the use of the word dhamma-niyamatā in the Pali canon sutras.
  • It should always be borne in mind that no individual is an actual sex but fluid because one can be reborn as any of the three genders -- male, female, pandaka. How many genders are there? The answer could easily be more than three because pandaka can be variously defined as pervert, eunuch (pansexual as the word is understood in the East not as we use it in the West), hermaphrodite, bi, gay, asexual, intersex, transgender, transsexual, crossdresser, etc.)
  • The Dalai Lama, who is Tibetan Vajrayana joked about this in one of his PR movies, declaring something like: "Of course a woman can become a buddha...she just has to be reborn as a man first" then laughing. People popularly regard him as the "Pope of Vajrayana Buddhism," though he is not; he's not even the pope of Tibetan Buddhism because the non-Gelug schools do not regard him as the pontiff but rather a useful political leader, a kind of temporal king who made it to the world stage with more than a little help from the CIA. This topic of gender should be questioned, debated, and explored as it seems awfully unfair and denigrating to femalehood, but might it be the case, as a Hindu priest once told our college Comparative Religion class that the reason a being, a gandhabba seeking rebirth in a human body, is reborn as a female rather than a male at any given rebirth is due to the level of attachment, affection, and clinging present in that relinking moment. If that is the case, we have all been and will all be females, so placing femininity one down from masculinity is a bad strategy that will turn around and bite us. Likewise, all females reborn as humans, as rare and difficult as it is to ever secure a human rebirth, will also experience what it's like to be a male. And we say with no confusion, it's not all it's cracked up to be.]
Humans love to carve ideal attributes in stone.
She may appear as a female bodhisattva (a "being bent on full or supreme enlightenment," the two not being the same thing, one being an arhat, the other a buddha) in Mahayana Buddhism [1].

In Vajrayana Buddhism, Green Tara is a female buddha who is a consort of the Cosmic Buddha Amoghasiddhi.

Tārā is also known as a savioress who hears the cries of beings in saṃsāra (the interminable round of rebirth and suffering) and saves them from worldly and spiritual danger [2].

In Vajrayana, she is considered to be a buddha, and the Tārā Tantra describes her as "a mother who gives birth to the buddhas of the three times [past, present, and future]" who is also "beyond saṃsāra and nirvāṇa" [3].
  • Earlier tradition distinguishes nirvana as being nothing like samsara, and since all we have ever known is the latter, anything else could be considered nirvana. Some do not like this definition as it seems to define nirvana, which many feel is ineffable, indescribable, and incomparable even though the historical Buddha Siddhartha Gautama did indeed define and describe it.
Tārā is one of the most important female deities in Vajrayana (Esoteric Buddhism) and is found in apocryphal sources like the Mañjuśrīmūlakalpa and the Guhyasamāja Tantra [4].

Key Indic Vajrayana texts that focus on Tārā include the Tantra Which Is the Source for All the Functions of Tārā, Mother of All the Tathagatas (Sanskrit Sarva-tathāgata-mātṛtārā-viśva-karma-bhavanāma-tantra) and Tārā's Fundamental Ritual Text (Tārāmūlakalpa) [5, 3].

Both Green and White Tārā remain popular meditation deities or yidams in Tibetan Buddhism, and Tara is also revered in Newar Buddhism.

Tārā is considered to take on many forms or emanations, while Green Tara emanates 21 Tārās, each with different attributes—colors, implements, and activities such as pacifying (śānti), increasing (pauṣṭika), enthralling (vaśīkaraṇa), and wrathful (abhicāra) [2].

Green Tara (or "blue-green," Sanskrit Samayatara or śyāmatārā) remains the most important form of the deity in Tibetan Buddhism [6, 7].

A practice text entitled Praises to the 21 Taras is a well known text on Tara in Tibetan Buddhism within Tibet, recited by children and adults, and is the textual source for the 21 forms of Green Tārā.

The main Tārā mantra is the same for Buddhists and Hindus: oṃ tāre tuttāre ture svāhā. It is uttered by Tibetans and Buddhists who follow Tibetan culture as oṃ tāre tu tāre ture soha. The literal translation would be "Oṃ O Tārā, I pray O Tārā, O Swift One, So Be It!" More
at No comments:

Every Buddhist "God" explained in minutes

  • These are the "Gods" of faith-based Mahayana, Vajrayana, Jodo Shinshu, Nicheren, Shingon...rather than the much smaller (10%) back-to-basics Theravada Buddhist tradition, which recognizes countless brahmas and devas, particularly Great Brahma and Sakka (Sakra, Indra), King of the Devas, but neither worships them nor regards them as "Gods" in the Western sense.
  • Pure Land (Sukhavati) of Amitabha Cosmic Buddha
at No comments:

LA punk rock with Social Distortion (5/5)



Television report from W5 about the early 1980's punk rock scene in Los Angeles, California, featuring Back In Control Center (hilarious) and Mike Ness' band Social Distortion.

As a kid in a punk rock garage band many years ago in LA, we once opened for Social D. It was a house party at a squatter's flat in Highland Park, where runaways and heavy partiers stayed. With electricity piped in from a long extension cord, we did what we could. Then came the house band Detox followed by Julie's SIN 34 from Santa Monica before SD headlined. If Hollywood makes a version of that night, it looked a bit like this (and nothing as cool as the first video):
(ANWE) Detox

On way to Social D show, we pass LA's 'open air drug market' (MacArthur Park)
A girl from SM can't be punk rock.

RIP Julie Lanfeld-Keskin (SIN 34)
I remember thinking, "Who does this guy think he is with makeup, way more than guyliner, and where can I get some?"

Even then Mike Ness was a powerful presence if only because it seemed for all the world that he did not give two S's, very in line with the Tao. Who knew he had a drinking problem?

Mystic Dharma Buddhist Temple, LA
The strange thing was, this being LA, there was a massive and mysterious Buddhist building (Mystic Dharma Temple) just down the street on Figueroa St. Rather than drinking, like the fictional character Kwai Chang Caine (Kung Fu), I was drawn to visiting it and learning to meditate from Ven. Chao Chu, a Sri Lankan Mahayana-Theravada polyglot hybrid monk and his snooty American assistant Dana.

Hardcore, alcohol free, vegan...straight edge
How did I get so lucky? Years later, visiting Sri Lanka and Malaysia, the senior Theravada scholar-monk Ven. K. Sri Dhammananda sighed a copy of his Dhammapada (verses and backstories), writing: "One who protects the Dhamma is protected by the Dhamma."

Punk could be very smart (DKs)
It seemed profound at the time, but instead of magic, what it really seems to be saying is very basic: Imagine working in an industrial factory and instead of a sign that reads how many days since the last accident, the bosses were to put up an inspirational note that read: "One who protects [keeps] the safety rules is protected by the safety rules." Rule No. 5 is "to undertake to abstain from alcohol and intoxicants that occasion heedlessness." I could leave the hard drinking to Mike Ness, Detox, and all the followers. I could be straight edge before that caught on on the west coast. I was already listening to east coast Minor Threat, British anarcho punk vegans Rudimentary Peni, and the Dead Kennedys, which was a start.

L.A. PUNK 13 (documentarian Lou Elovitz)
Karma being what it is, we eventually ended up getting advanced degrees at UCLA, but not before Chao Chu and I attended the local community college to make up for a wasted youth in high school. There we started the college's first Buddhist club. The temple, the monk, and Dana eventually moved to Rosemead.

Mayor of the Sunset Strip
Karma, it makes for a long strange trip. So, as the saying goes, "be careful who you step on to move up in the world; you'll be seeing them again on the way down" or some such. Brad Warner was nowhere to be seen, but Noah Levine might have been around as well as Steve Pfauter. Maybe L.A. PUNK 13 knows all of this in greater detail.

The scene, the rise of punk rock in Los Angeles and Southern California was ignited by KROQ's most significant DJ ever, the pervy Jewish Mayor of the Sunset Strip Rodney "On the 'ROQ" Bingenheimer.


Swami Vivekananda at Mead sisters house
Strangely, this House of the Rising Sun (aka Haunted House, S**t House) was very near the Self-Realization Fellowship Mother Center above us on Mt. Washington (the privileged enclave Billie Eilish and Finneas O'C lived in when they got mega famous), the Southwest Museum of the American Indian on the side of the mountain and Lummis House next to the concrete LA River, not too far from the Victorian Mead sisters house in South Pasadena Swami Vivekananda chose as his center on the west coast when he declared Pasadena the "Varanasi of the West."


Live fast, die young...or the opposite
One of the strange things about living in LA is its proximity to Hollywood, the throat chakra of the West, like the larger Bollywood is for the East (or India at least) is running into stars. We were at the radio station (KROQ.com, 106.7 FM), at the Audacy Corporation in the Miracle Mile district celebrating Cinco de Mayo at the cantina Descanso. Across the street, legendary punk pioneers Social Distortion was going to play a secret show at the station's new Sound Stage. A few maneuvers later, we were in! But what a strange trip. Standing next to Punk Rock Girl to see cancer survivor Mike Ness, once the epitome of tough guy drunk (now 40 years sober in AA), looking like some kind of gavone from the Lower East Side of NY or some TV gangster mobster as Megan Holiday and Kevin Ryder roll him out for an interview. Nice guy, learned a lot from AA, but he can barely talk or think or comprehend what's going on. The crowd loved it, having won tickets for the coveted show over the past few weeks. Flagging, failing self-proclaimed "punk influencer" Punk Rock Girl (Erin Micklow), who was persona non grata at the Queen Mary punk show and has been banned from Punk Rock Bowling at the Punk Museum in Las Vegas, we hear, weaseled her way in. "Who does a girl have to sl**p with to get into these things?" she might be asking. We would tell her if she asked us. But she seemed to enjoy herself as much as the Ozempic crowd largely in attendance. Punk rock never died, but it sure has been through a lot. Social D has a new album, Born to Kill, coming out after 15 years, and heartless corporate entity KROQ is doing them a solid due to all the fans they still have.

When Punk Rock was Funny
SIN 34 Die Laughing EP (LA female-fronted hardcore punk)

Tibetan bad@ss wrathful protective spirit?

Who needs punk rock when there's crossover thrash black speed metal?

at No comments: