God on why women are the way they are

Family Guy; Mineke Schnipper (Never Marry a...), Hindustan Times; Editors, Wisdom Quarterly

Archangel Michael defeats Satan

Some variants doubt Eve originated from Adam’s rib [literally his "side"] because of an incident that preceded her creation. This is a version of that story as told by a Sudanese refugee in the Congo.

God or Devil to blame?

God sends the archangel Gabriel from heaven down to the earth to take the rib from sleeping Adam’s body.

Flying back to heaven, Gabriel meets the Devil on his way. The Devil asks, ‘Gabriel, hi, how are you?’ Gabriel answers politely and hurries on to heaven.

We gotta help God teach these idiots something. Look at this fool. We're just not reaching him.

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Lilith (Adam's first wife) was before Eve

The Devil has not failed to notice the curious object in Gabriel’s hand: he gets closer and flies along with the archangel. ‘What’s that?’ he asks curiously. ‘None of your business,’ replies Gabriel curtly. The Devil insists, but the archangel keeps quiet.

Then, with a sudden move, the Devil snatches the rib from Gabriel who immediately goes after the Devil. The Devil escapes from Gabriel’s grip and makes off as quickly as he can, but Gabriel does not want to return to God emptyhanded, and resolutely holds onto his enemy.

For a long time, they fly and wrestle, wrestle and fly, before the Devil succeeds in struggling free. On they fly, silently, one after the other. The Devil tries to give Gabriel the slip, but the archangel is determined not to let go.

Women in Proverbs (Schipper)

Finally, Gabriel catches up and succeeds in grabbing the Devil’s tail. Of course, the Devil tries his best to struggle free again, but Gabriel holds no less firmly on, until all of a sudden, the Devil’s tail breaks off.

Since the archangel did not succeed in getting Adam’s rib back, it is this part of the Devil’s body he brought to God in heaven, and this is what the first woman has been made of...