Inuit parents teach kids to control anger

Michaeleen Doucleff,  Jane Greenhalgh, NPR, 3/13/19; Eds., Wisdom Quarterly

How Inuit parents teach kids to control their anger

Jean Briggs Collection (Amer. Philo. Society)

For more than 30 years, the Inuit welcomed anthropologist Jean Briggs into their lives so she could study how they raise their children. Briggs is pictured during a 1974 visit to Baffin Island.

Back in the 1960s, a Harvard graduate student made a landmark discovery about the nature of human anger. At age 34, Jean Briggs traveled above the Arctic Circle and lived out on the tundra for 17 months.

There were no roads, no heating systems, no grocery stores. Winter temperatures could easily dip below minus 40 degrees Fahrenheit. Briggs persuaded an Inuit family to "adopt" her and "try to keep her alive," as the anthropologist wrote in 1970.

At the time, many Inuit families lived similar to the way their ancestors had for thousands of years. They built igloos in the winter and tents in the summer. "And we ate only what the animals provided, such as fish, seal, and caribou," says Myna Ishulutak, a film producer and language teacher who lived a similar lifestyle as a young girl.

Briggs quickly realized something remarkable was going on in these families: The adults had an extraordinary ability to control their anger.

"They never acted in anger toward me, although they were angry with me an awful lot," Briggs told the Canadian Broadcasting Corp. in an interview.

Even just showing a smidgen of frustration or irritation was considered weak and childlike, Briggs observed.

For instance, one time someone knocked a boiling pot of tea across the igloo, damaging the ice floor. No one changed their expression. "Too bad," the offender said calmly and went to refill the teapot.

In another instance, a fishing line — which had taken days to braid — immediately broke on the first use. No one flinched in anger. "Sew it together," someone said quietly.

By contrast, Briggs seemed like a wild child, even though she was trying very hard to control her anger. "My ways were so much cruder, less considerate, and more impulsive," she told the CBC.

"[I was] often impulsive in an antisocial sort of way. I would sulk or I would snap or I would do something that they never did." Briggs, who died in 2016, wrote up her observations in her first book, Never in Anger.

But she was left with a lingering question: How do Inuit parents instill this ability in their children? How do Inuit take tantrum-prone toddlers and turn them into cool-headed adults? More

This story is part of a series from NPR's Science desk called The Other Side of Anger. There's no question we are in angry times. It's in our politics, our schools and homes. Anger can be a destructive emotion, but it can also be a positive force. Join NPR in our exploration of anger and what we can learn from this powerful emotion. Read and listen to stories in the series here.