Monday, October 25, 2021

The Devil (Ted Lasso) on SNL + Sutra


Weekend Update: The Devil on His Latest Accomplishments
(SNL, Oct. 23, 2021) Saturday Night Live welcomes The Devil (Ted Lasso's Jason Sudeikis like Jon Lovitz shown below) on Weekend Update to discuss what he’s been working on lately, like vaping, cell phones, and Trump’s new social media platform, "Truth."
SUTRA: Devils talking in the moonlight
Juñha Sutra: "Moonlit" (Ud 4.4, PTS: Ud 39), Dhr. Seven (ed.) based on Ven. Thanissaro (trans.)

Thus have I heard. On one occasion the Blessed One (the Buddha) was staying near Rājagaha at the Bamboo Grove, the Squirrels' Sanctuary.

On that occasion Ven. Sāriputra and Ven. Mahā Moggallāna were staying in Pigeon's Cave on a moonlit night.

Ven. Sāriputra, his head just shaven, was sitting in the open air, having attained a deep level of concentration (samadhi).

Watch me punch this guy. - No, friend, don't.
Two devils (yakkhas), friends and companions, were flying north to south on some business or other when they saw Ven. Sāriputra sitting there. Seeing him, one devil said to the other, "I'm inspired to give this wandering ascetic blow on the head."

When this was said the other devil said to the first, "Enough of that, friend. No, don't lay a hand on this wandering ascetic. He's an outstanding recluse of great power and might."

But a second time the first devil said to the second, "I'm inspired to give this wandering ascetic a blow on the head."

And second time the second said to the first, "Enough of that, friend. No, don't lay a hand on this wandering ascetic. He's an outstanding recluse of great power and might."

But a third time the first said to the second, "I'm inspired to give this wandering ascetic a blow on the head."

And yet a third time, the second said to the first, "Enough of that, friend. No, don't lay a hand on this wandering ascetic. He's an outstanding recluse of great power and great might."

Then the first devil, ignoring the second devil, dealt Ven. Sāriputra a tremendous blow on the head. With that blow he might have knocked over an elephant standing seven or eight cubits tall, or split a great rocky crag.

Right then and there the devil — screaming "I'm burning!" — fell into the Great Hell (Avici, the "Waveless Deep").

Ven. Sariputra, monk foremost in wisdom
Ven. Maha Moggallāna — with his divine third eye, purified and surpassing human vision — saw that devil deal Ven. Sāriputra a blow on the head. Seeing this, he went to Ven. Sāriputra and said, "I hope you are well, friend Sāriputra. I hope you are comfortable. I hope you are free from pain."

"I am well, friend Moggallāna," Ven. Sariputra answered. "I'm comfortable, but I do have a slight headache."

"How amazing, friend Sāriputra! How astounding! How great your power and might! Just now a devil dealt you a blow on the head. So great was that blow that he might have knocked over an elephant standing seven or eight cubits tall or split a great rocky crag. But all you say is, 'I am well, friend Moggallāna. I'm comfortable, but I do have a slight headache'!"

"How amazing, friend Moggallāna! How astounding! How great is your power and might! Where you saw a yakkha just now, I didn't even see a dust devil!"

The Blessed One — with the divine ear-element purified and surpassing human hearing — heard those two great beings conversing in this way.

Then, realizing the significance, the Blessed One exclaimed:

Whose mind, standing like rock, shakes not,
dispassionate toward things that ignite passion,
unprovoked by things that spark provocation?
When mind is developed like this from where
can there come disappointment or suffering?*
  • *A variation of this verse is attributed to Ven. Khitaka at Thag 2.36 (Verses 191-192, PTS edition):
Whose mind, standing like rock, shakes not
dispassionate toward things that ignite passion,
unprovoked by things that spark provocation?
When mind is developed like this, from where
can there come disappointment or suffering?

My mind, standing like rock, shakes not,
dispassionate toward things that ignite passion,
unprovoked by things that spark provocation.
When my mind is developed like this, from where
can there come to me disappointment and suffering?

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