We need new curse words (or old ones)

VintageNews.com edited by Wisdom Quarterly

I say, Old Boy, it's poppycock and bloody bollocks! By Jove, it's a Wankel rotary engine!

.

When it comes to cursing, cussing, or swearing, today we have a huge vernacular to choose from. 

Besides separate curse words, we are capable of inventing many more juicy phrases then combining them to form even crazier sentences. Only our irritation, anger, and foolhardy negligence with regard to unskillful verbal karma (violating the five fundamental precepts) is the limit.

Just look at this foul nude figurine

When we go back to a time when swearing was being invented as a form of “art” (although it probably existed even before language, when a simple “Aaaarrrrrghhh” could mean a lot), things sounded quite a bit different.

When we hear a curse word from the olden days, viewing it from the perspective of modern usage, it somehow sounds adorable, sweet, even childish. 

Such terms surely sounded harsh and rude in their time. Nevertheless, people must have had more style back then, even when they swore. Some words mentioned here are so “charming” they sound like they are attempting to express fondness rather annoyance or harm.

Considering the charm of these old-fashioned swears, they should be resurrected and used in “normal,” day-to-day conversation. Here are some of those words:

• sard
• beard splitter
• candlenacky
• ipswitch
• moist
• "Belgium!"
• bugler
• sod
• naff off
• meegums
• pokidot
• cloik
• gruntmaster
• Wankel rotary engine
• dinklage
• dundersnatch
• gargleblaster
• grumplesphincter... More

*Note: In case it is not obvious, we made most of these up or borrowed them from the English language genius Douglas Adams, author of the Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy series, "Belgium" being the very worst of all, according to the Guide..