Showing posts with label integral yoga. Show all posts
Showing posts with label integral yoga. Show all posts

Monday, August 24, 2026

Is 99% of modern yoga fake 'bhoga'?

I'm ready for yoga! I did the most important thing. I bought this outfit that really shows my...
(Miska Käppi) I studied yoga for 20 years, and 99% was fake

OK, they say never drink before yoga class, but I think a little booze is not bad. Oops!!!

  • Bhoja is not bogus; it is "something done for enjoyment," according to B.K.S. Iyengar, says Miska Käppi, as many bhojis calling themselves "yogis" practice nowadays.
  • Opposites — Ashtanga Yoga Sanskrit
  • Yoga is not a lot of twisting, breathing, or jumping around in a modern studio; it is to "unite," to bring about "union" of the self (atman, "soul") with Brahman (the Ultimate) and/or breath (prana, "holy spirit"), the conventional divine (Brahma, the Creator), Vishnu (the Preserver) usually nowadays in the form of Shiva, the Destroyer
What looks like a repeating gif is actually a remarkable stunt
Yoga postures for balance, strength, and flexibility
Messianic Bikram Choudhury as persecuted Christ figure
  • What is "the real thing"? One answer is The Eightfold Path: Ashtanga (Integral Yoga sometime Raja/Royal Yoga), a system of achieving "union" with the divine by the practice of eight limbs of the path: Yamas (external disciplines), Niyamas (internal disciplines), Asanas (physical postures), Pranayama (breath control), Pratyahara (sense withdrawal), Dharama (concentration), Dhyana (meditative absorptions, jhanas), and Samadhi (union, integration, coherence). The whole purpose of Yoga -- at least in ancient times between gurus and chelas (teachers and disciples) -- is MEDITATION. Asanas (lit. "seats") allow one to sit longer, more comfortably, and with stability. That is to say, practicing for the meditative absorptions is to reach of Samadhi. Who can say otherwise?



Sunday, July 19, 2026

Jordan Peterson: The Story of the Buddha

(Bite-sized Philosophy) Jordan Peterson: The Story of Buddha

Seriously sick Professor Jordan Peterson seems to be hallucinating or conflating as he pontificates on the allegory of the "Story of the Buddha" mixing it up with the Christian interpretation of the "Story of Adam and Eve" and Paradise Lost in terms of Joseph Campbell' "hero's journey."

Animated allegory: Life of the Buddha

Adam and Eve doomed

Tuesday, June 2, 2026

Colonialism rewrote Hinduism


(Neo Dharmism) Colonialism rewrote Hinduism [all of the traditions found along the Indus balled up and turned into a "religion" by the British, having also been systematized and more or less unified by Adi Shankara-acharya]: Here's what European scholars erased
  • "Hinduism" (which calls itself the Sanātana Dharma or "Eternal Truth") traces its roots back thousands of years to Brahmanism (the tradition of the educated Brahmin priestly caste) and the Old Vedic Religion derived from the Vedas.

Kuladevata at Beluru Chennakeshava
Kuladevata (Sanskrit कुलदेवता, Romanized Kuladevatā, lit. "clan deity," a minor god or goddess) [1], also known as a kuladaivaṃ (Malayalam കുലദൈവം, Telugu కులదైవం) [2], an ancestral "tutelary deity" in Hinduism and Jainism [3].

Such a deity (devi, deva, devata) is often the object of one's spiritual devotion (bhakti) and is coaxed to watch over one's clan (kula), lineage (gotra), family, and children to protect them from misfortune.

Hinduism in America: A Convergence
This is distinct from an ishta-devata ("personal tutelar") and a grāma-devatā ("village deities") [4].

A male deity is called a kula-deva and female deity kula-devi (sometimes spelled kuldev or kuldevi respectively, particularly since Hindi drops many of the a's overly used in Sanskrit) [5].

ETYMOLOGY: The word kuladevata is derived from two words, kula, meaning "clan," and devata, meaning "deity," referring to the ancestral deities that are worshipped by particular clans [6]. More

Different masters, the same truths?

Monday, May 18, 2026

What's punk got to do with Buddhism?


(Jacob DeSio Reviews) Ideology over aesthetics: To be without rulers: SLC Punk: Punks v Posers

It's my look, but maybe it'll be my ideology.
Maybe it's just by chance that an American growing up in Amerikkka would gravitate towards punk rock's aggressive musick, rebellion, DIY ethic, and freedom-oriented rock aesthetic AND also toward the Teachings of the "Awakened One" (the Buddha). After all, if we were to translate the term "Budh-ism" into English, "Awakenism" would be a great start.

The Dharmic traditions all lean towards liberation (moksha, vimutti = "freedom") and, as such, they did not really begin as "religions." They're treated as religions now, to be sure. The British colonizers imposed that way of thinking on the various dharmas or "doctrines" of India, the paths to freedom taught by famous awakening teachers. It's good to say "awakening" here instead of "awakened" because Buddhism does not recognize that everyone who is called "enlightened" actually is. What the Buddha meant by the term is very specific. In Buddhism, arahant (Sanskrit arhat) is reserved for seven kinds of livings beings (the "noble ones" or Aryans):
  1. stream enterer (three kinds of sotapannas):
    1. one-seeder (ekabijin)
    2. one who will be reborn at most seven times (sattakkhattuparama)
    3. one reborn among noble families three or four times (kolankola).
  2. once returner (sakkadagami)
  3. non-returner (anagami)
  4. fully awakened (arahant). One could say there are three kinds of arhats as well since in addition to being a "fully" awakened noble disciple, one might be a "non-teaching supremely enlightened person" (pacceka-buddha) or in extraordinarily rare instances, a "supremely enlightened teacher" (samma-sam-buddha).
  • These descriptions are part of Early Buddhism, preserved in the Pali canon of Theravada Buddhism, specifically explained in The Path to Freedom (Vimutti-magga), condensed to just four kinds by lumping the three varieties of stream enterers into just one grouping in The Path of Purification (Visuddhi-magga). It seems that in these modern times, only Wisdom Quarterly cares about the distinction. Goodness knows that by borrowing from Brahmanism and Hinduism, later Mahayana movement writers have invented new categories like countless bodhisattvas, mahasattvas, and "Cosmic Buddhas" like Amitabbha, Vairocana, Ksitigarbha, and others to worship in place of taking guidance (sarana) from the historical Buddha Shakya-muni ("Sage of the Indo-Scythians/Sakas"), Siddhattha Gotama, Siddhartha Gautama.

But before actual stream entry (entering the "stream" or sota that inevitably leads to complete freedom = nirvana), there are practices and beliefs the Dharmic traditions have in common, like reaching samadhi ("stillness," "mental coherence" resulting in "superconsciousness," sublime states and transcendental realizations). In fact, many Indian traditions consider samadhi to be the ultimate goal, knowing nothing higher. The Buddha did certainly point higher, adding insight practices (vipassana) to the already known states of meditative absorptions (the dhyanas or in Pali jhanas).

Minor Threat: "I was early to finish. I was late to start. I might be an adult.
But I'm a minor at heart." Fugazi: I wait, I wait, I wait in the Waiting Room

The Eight Limbs of Yoga (Patanjali)
Why does Integral (Ashtanga) Yoga teach an eightfold system, as made popular by the sage Patanjali? It is precisely because of the historical Buddha's super popularity throughout the subcontinent at that time that Patanjali thought he should formulate the Vedic, Brahminical, Hindu (a term that would not be invented for centuries) path to samadhi in the same form as the Buddha's Ennobling (lit. Enlightening) Eightfold Path. "Noble" (Arya) means "enlightened."

Noble Eightfold Path (Dharma Wheel) | Zazzle
One has to slosh around through a lot of Western misinterpretations, explanations, practices, Eastern teachers, and etymologies to rectify one's understanding and remove the confusion that has settled on Eastern philosophy and Dharmic traditions to see it clearly. There have been many well-intentioned translators and teachers over the decades that have inadvertently muddied the water and introduced some wrong notions. It's inevitable. If one practices and practices, those misunderstanding get straightened out.


PUNK has always been about individualism, questioning, rebellion, a willingness to set off on one's own path of investigation, practice, and self-realization. No one can do it for us, and "faith" (particularly of the blind sort) is just not in the cards.

PUNK is fun and, at least in the past, was very funny. It was not profit-driven. The goal from the beginning was freedom, personal and social, to liberate oneself and others. Maybe no one agreed on what a revolution would look like, but the enemy was pretty clear: sexist/racist cops working for the economic elite to maintain the status quo, gatekeepers, authority figures, bosses, dictators, know-it-alls, the forces of oppression bearing down on our pursuit of life, liberty, and happiness.


The founding ideals of our country never promised happiness, but those ideals did very clearly say we had a right to PURSUE happiness as we saw fit. In practice, it was nothing like that, just an Animal Farm/1984-style set of tricks, being told what to believe, how to behave, what to like, what to follow, and so on. Enough of that. The hippies were right, but they were no longer getting anywhere, so the pendulum had to swing the other way. Workers had to arise. Conservatives had to knock it off. Liberals had to wake up. Somebody had to flip off the patriarchy and its father figures.

The CIA, FBI, and PTB (powers that be) were not going to let this movement succeed any more than they had any of the previous ones. They can't stop these things, but they can guide them to implode. Movements are like that. What about individuals? What about intellectuals, poets, artists, and independent thinkers? The government has a game called whack-a-mole for that. They stop this rebellion or that, but another one will take its place. It's like Jello once said in "I Am the Owl." Black Flag had something to say beyond self-defeating aggression when they sang, "Rise Above." But the hippies had something to say, too. "What the world needs now is peace, love, and understanding" and, if not, then how about anarchy, hate, and profanities. How does that strike you, Society?

If England/Britain ruined us as a colony-cum-country, it had a little something to do with the rebellion:


(egi alams) The Germs: The More Dangerous Sounding Darby Crash
  • Seth Auberon, Dhr. Seven, Pfc. Sandoval, Wisdom Quarterly

Tuesday, May 12, 2026

Rancid punk: I want your Salvation, woe oh

(Rock 'N Roll True Stories) Drugs, desperate Madonna, millions! Rancid's path to punk stardom

And the universe said "om"
What is "salvation"?
Moksha (Sanskrit मोक्ष, mokṣa) is also called vimutti* or vimukti and also mukti and vimoksha [3].

It is a concept in the Dharmic religions -- Buddhism, Hinduism, Jainism, and Sikhism -- that means liberation, non-bondage, freedom, emancipation, deliverance, escape, salvation, release, nirvana [4].

Los Angeles damnation
(PBS SoCal) The Chinatown punk rock wars of Los Angeles

I want your "Salvation"

In its soteriological and eschatological senses, it refers to freedom from saṃsāra, the incessant Cycle of Rebirths and Deaths [5]. In its epistemological and psychological senses, moksha is freedom from ignorance: self-realization, self-actualization, self-knowledge [6]....

  • NOTE: If moksha were just what the Vedas, Brahmins, or Hinduism says it is, there would be no need for a supremely enlightened one, the Buddha, to arise and make known a Teaching and Training that culminates in Buddhist nirvana, which is the real end of all suffering and rebirth, not mere rebirth in a long lasting heavenly plane or in the company of Brahma or other such stand ins.
Moksha (vimutti) is nirvana

Release from rebirth is release from all suffering
*In Buddhism the term moksha is uncommon, but there is an equivalent Pali term vimutti, "freedom," "release," "escape."

In the sutras two forms of freedom or release are mentioned, namely ceto-vimutti, "deliverance of mind," and panna-vimutti, "deliverance through wisdom" (insight or vipassana).

Ceto-vimutti is related to the practice of jhana or dhyana (shamatha), while panna-vimutti is related to the cultivation of insight.

Dharmas agree on moksha, they just define it differently, with Buddhism defining it as ultimate
.
According to Gombrich, the distinction may be a later development, which resulted in a change of doctrine, regarding the practice of jhana to be insufficient for final liberation [108]. It is the first step, setting up the foundation of calm on top of which is built insight through mindfulness (sati, satipatthana, Dependent Origination).

With release comes nirvana (Pali nibbana), "quenching," "slaking," "cooling," "blowing out," or "extinguishing" the fires of the defiled passions and the wrong view of self [109, 110].

It is a "timeless state" (akaliko) in which there is no further becoming [111]. Nirvana ends the otherwise endless cycle of rebirth and suffering (dukkha) in the 31 Planes of Existence, which for simplification Mahayana reduces to six realms of saṃsāra [112, Note 2].

It is the third of the Four Ennobling (Enlightening) Truths  of Buddhism, which plays a central role in Theravada Buddhism [117, 118].

What can be said of the ultimate attainment?
Nirvana has been described in Buddhist texts in ways that make it sound like other Indian religions. Every tradition says it has complete liberation, freedom, ultimate bliss, the highest happiness, fearlessness, emancipation, dukkha-lessness, permanence, the deathless, the unconditioned element that is the only thing that is not dependently originated, the unconstructed, unfathomable, ineffable, indescribable [119, 120].

The unconditioned element: nirvana (Ven. Bodhi)
It has also been described as release marked by a realization of the "emptiness" (impersonal, non-self nature of ALL conditioned things but most significantly the Five Aggregates clung to as self) [121, 122, 123].
 
Such descriptions are debated by scholars because "nirvana" in Buddhism is described as a state or condition after the dissolution of ignorance and suffering (disappointment, dis-ease, distress, ill, woe, off-kilter, unsatisfactoriness), of luminous mind, which would seem to be "stopped consciousness (blown out), but one that is not non-existent," as Peter Harvey states, and for him "it seems impossible to imagine what awareness devoid of any object would be like" [124, 112].

Nirvana is much more than the end of suffering.
See Bhikkhu Bodhi's exhaustive description in The Teachings of the Buddha: As It Is (early lecture series). Words and concepts cannot do nirvana justice because it is unlike everything else in samsara. Therefore, it is not a thought or concept but something very real to be personally experienced. Freedom awaits. More
  • Rock 'N Roll True Stories; Punk Rock MBA; Rancid; Dhr. Seven, Seth Auberon (eds.), Wisdom Quarterly Wiki edit

Monday, February 23, 2026

Pinocchio Day: Pineal Gland (3rd Eye) Boy


Crown, brow, throat chakras (Rajasthan 18th century)
The fruits of monastic life?
The attainment of these six higher powers or knowledges is mentioned in a number of sutras (Buddhist discourses), most famously the "Fruits of Monastic Life Discourse" (Samaññaphala Sutta, DN 2) [8].
The attainment of the first four (of eight) meditative absorptions (jhanas) is considered to be a prerequisite for the attainment of the higher powers [5].

The sixth type is the ultimate goal of Buddhism, which is the end of all suffering and the destruction of all ignorance [9].

According to the Buddha, indulgence in these supranormal powers or abhiññās should be avoided, as they can easily distract one from the ultimate goal of enlightenment [4] and liberation.

  • Sire, those who have penetrated to a direct understanding of the Four Noble [Ennobling, Enlightening] Truths, seen the truths, understood the Teaching, who have crossed over from perplexity to the Four Fruits of Recluseship and, having obtained the bliss of these fruits, share these fruits with others who are practicing rightly — practitioners such as these, sire, are called fruit-vendors in the Blessed One's City of Dhamma. More (I.B. Horner, Bodhi Leaves 130, BPS)
Similarly, the Three Knowledges or Wisdoms (tevijja or tivijja) are:
  1. "Remembering one's former abodes or rebirths" (pubbe-nivāsanussati);
  2. The "divine eye" (dibba-cakkhu), the ability to see with inner vision not dependent on the external eyes; and,
  3. The "extinction of mental defilements and intoxicants" (āsavakkhaya) [10].
The Three Knowledges are mentioned in numerous sutras, including the Maha-Saccaka Sutta (MN 36) in which the Buddha describes how he obtained each of these Three Knowledges respectively on the first, second, and third watches of the night of his great awakening (bodhi, enlightenment).

These forms of special knowledge are typically listed as arising after the attainment of the fourth meditative absorption (jhana) [11], which is the first of four immaterial absorptions. More


Happy Pinocchio Day (Feb. 23rd)

Le avventure di Pinocchio.
Storia di un burattino
 (1883)
Pinocchio Day is celebrated on February 23rd every year. The day marks the anniversary of the release of the Disney film of the same name in 1940. Disney’s “Pinocchio” went on to become a global sensation due to its familiarity as a folk tale in Europe. It was based on the 1883 Italian book The Adventures of Pinocchio by Carlo Collodi. “Pinocchio” followed as Disney studio’s second animated feature-length film after “Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs.” The animated film follows a puppet named Pinocchio in his attempt to become a real human.

History of Pinocchio Day
La statua del pinocchione di Collodi
“The Adventures of Pinocchio” was originally published in a serialized format under the name “The Story of a Puppet” in a weekly magazine, starting on July 7, 1881. The popularity of the series led to all the installments being compiled and published as a novel in 1883. Since then, the misadventures of Pinocchio have become deeply ingrained into the cultural zeitgeist. The book is now considered a canonical piece of children’s literature. The character of Pinocchio has either featured in or been referenced in many pieces of popular fiction since. Source: nationaltoday.com
  • Dhr. Seven, Ananda (Dharma Buddhist Meditation), Pat Macpherson (eds.), Wisdom Quarterly Wiki edit; NationalToday.com, Feb. 23, 2026

Saturday, January 3, 2026

Saintly Himalayan Yogi's Eightfold Path


The Dhammapada: mind - Ajahn Brahm: God vs. Bodhi

An 85-year-old Himalayan yogi, rumored to leave no trace in the snow, says true happiness comes from...

  • What is the "Yoga" (system, tapas, austerity, program) he follows? It is surely Integral Yoga also generally known as Ashtanga or "Eight Limbs." He does not merely do poses or keep a vegetarian diet. He goes much further to include all aspects of the path:
The definition of "yoga"
The Sage Pātañjali (author of the Yoga Sutras or "Yoga Aphorisms") begins his treatise on yoga (1st–3rd century CE) by stating the purpose of writing his book in the first sutra, followed by defining the word "yoga" in his second sutra of Book 1:[2].

योगश्चित्तवृत्तिनिरोधः ॥२॥
yogaś-citta-vṛtti-nirodhaḥ
— Yoga Sutras 1.2

This terse definition hinges on the meaning of three Sanskrit terms:

I. K. Taimni translates it as, "Yoga is the inhibition (nirodhaḥ [usually translated as "cessation"]) of the modifications (vṛtti) of the mind (citta)" [3].

Swami Vivekananda translates this aphorism as, "Yoga is restraining (nirodhah) the mind-stuff (citta) from taking various forms (vrittis)" [4].

When the mind is stilled, the seer or real Self is revealed: 1.3. Then the Seer is established in his [or her] own essential and fundamental nature. 1.4.

In other states there is assimilation (of the Seer) with the modifications (of the mind) [5].

Sadhguru's no guru but tell jokes to Westerners

Eight limbs

Patanjali compiled the yoga aphorisms
Pātañjali set out his definition of "yoga" in the Yoga Sūtras as having eight limbs [following the popularity of the historical Buddha's Dharma being condensed into a Noble Eightfold Path] (अष्टाङ्ग, āṅga, "eight limbs") as follows. These are the Eight Limbs of Yoga:
  1. yama (abstinences),
  2. niyama (observances),
  3. āsana (postures),
  4. prāṇā-yāma (breath control),
  5. pratyāhāra (withdrawal of the senses),
  6. dhāraṇā (concentration),
  7. dhyāna (meditation), and
  8. samādhi (absorption)" [6].
The eightfold path of Pātañjali's yoga consists of a set of prescriptions for a morally disciplined and purposeful life, of which the āsana (yoga postures) form only one limb [7]. More

Buddhism has a different set of Eight Limbs to Enlightenment


What is the path to supreme liberation?
As in Buddhism's Noble Eightfold Path, all of these terms are loaded. They are full of meaning, leaving many aspects to each term or heading. They are not the same path and do NOT lead to the same goal. The goal of yoga is "union," whereas the goal of the Buddha-Dharma is enlightenment and nirvana.
  1. Right View: various summaries of "right view" can be found in Buddhist texts. A stock phrase is the opening of the dhamma-eye, in which knowledge arises: "All that has the nature of arising has the nature of ending" [33, Note 2]; showing the futility of striving after worldly fulfillment. More extensive treatments state that our karma (actions) have consequences, death is not the end, and our words, actions, and beliefs have consequences after death. The Buddha himself followed and taught a successful path out of this world and the other world (heaven and underworld/hells),[36, 37, 38, Web 2] and his example can be followed to the same successful result. Later on, right view came to explicitly include karma and rebirth and the importance of the Four Noble Truths, when "insight" (vipassana) became central to Buddhist soteriology, especially in Theravada Buddhism [39, 40].
  2. Right Intention (samyaka-saṃkalpa/sammā-saṅkappa) can also be known as "right thought," "right aspiration," "right resolve," or "right motivation" [41]. In this factor, one aspires to let go, renounce (stop clinging to) the worldly life and follow the Buddhist path [42] of purification and freedom. The practitioner is full of thoughts of and intends to strive toward non-violence (ahimsa) and avoid violent and hateful/aversive conduct [40].
  3. Right Speech: avoiding lying, abuse, division, and idle chatter [43, 44].
  4. Right Conduct: to avoid killing or injuring, taking what is not given, sexual misconduct, intoxication.
  5. Right Livelihood: avoiding trading in weapons, living beings, meat, intoxicants/poisons.
  6. Right Effort: preventing the arising of unwholesome mental states that not arisen, deposing ones that have, generating wholesome states, and maintaining them to their consummation. What are the profitable mental states? The Seven Factors of Enlightenment (bojjhaṅgā). This includes "guarding the sense-doors" (indriya-samvara), restraint of the sense faculties [45, 46].
  7. Right Mindfulness (sati; satipatthana; sampajañña): a quality that guards the heart/mind as it dispassionately watches over [47] and looks on. The stronger mindfulness becomes, the weaker unwholesome states of mind become, weakening their power "to take over and dominate thought, word, and deed" [48, Note 3]. In the insight meditation (vipassana) movement, mindfulness is interpreted as dispassionate "bare attention," watching, vigilance, remaining present and aware with whatever arises in this moment: not being absent minded, but rather being conscientious and conscious of what one is doing; this encourages the awareness of the impermanence of body, feelings, and mind, as well as to dispassionately examine the Five Aggregates clung to as self (skandhas), the Five Hindrances, the Four Noble Truths, and the Seven Factors of Enlightenment [46].
  8. Right Samadhi (passaddhi; ekaggata; sampasadana): practicing the Four Stages of Jhana (Sanskrit dhyāna or "meditation"), which includes samadhi/absorption proper in the second stage and reinforces the development of the Seven Factors of Enlightenment, culminating in equanimity (upekkhā) and mindfulness (sati) [50]. In the Theravada tradition and the insight meditation movement, this is interpreted as singlepointedness of mind (ekaggata), stillness, focus, concentration, one-pointedness of the mind, fulfilled through the Four Foundations of Mindfulness as vipassana meditation, which aims at liberating insight from all illusion. More

Wednesday, November 26, 2025

Sad Guru's truth about masturbation


O, Wick Men, give me your knuckle babies
The Christian and Jewish Bibles have so little to say about masturbation that in a mindboggling reach, Church officials (guilty Catholics or officious Protestants or killjoy Jews) could only come up with the story of Onan and the awkward, inapplicable synonymous term "onanism." Nothing could be less connected to masturbation.

A Jewish man's brother dies, leaving his wife without a child. By Jewish custom and (levirate) law, he has to impregnate her in his absence. But just as he finishes the fun part his duty, he thinks better of it, reflecting on how troublesome another child and/or wife will be for him and not wanting to be burdened by those responsibilities, he withdraws as he finishes. God is so p'd off, we're told, that He smites (murders) him on the spot for "spilling his seed" on the ground rather than the fertile woman. Voila! Masturbation. Which as we all know involves having procreative sex with a partner but then changing your mind, right? 🙄
  • Buddhism and sexuality In Buddhism, prohibitions against masturbation apply to monastics. By extension lay people may undertake to avoid them, and that is healthy and good, but one can no more find a "commandment" against it for ordinary people in Buddhist texts as one could locate one in Christian texts. Inciting lust, particularly through porn, is terribly harmful, and the Buddha did say something to the effect that it would be better to swallow a red-hot iron ball. But even that is in reference to being an "immoral monastic" swallowing food offered as alms by laypeople. If one insists on having sex (or fornicating, which means doing it without being married), go Tantric.
One is reminded of a truly tasteless joke:

A man nudged his wife for some nookie in front of their child. She asked him, "What?" - "How about we, you know?" - "What, are you crazy? You're going to ask me for that in front of our baby?!" - "Well, what do you want me to do?" - "Next time you want some whoopie, ask me to do 'a load of laundry.'" - "Oh, O.K." - Later that night, the wife primps and preps and makes a dramatic entrance in the bedroom. But the husband rolls over, turning his back to her. She pokes him and angrily and says, "I thought you wanted me to do a load of laundry!?" - "Oh, that's O.K. It was a small load. I did it by hand."

Fortunately, Wiki has this caveat: The word onanism is not based on the biblical story of Onan itself but on an interpretation of that biblical story. For the word onanism is not found in any form in biblical texts. Thus, the etymological connection of onanism (as masturbation) with Onan's name is religiously misleading" [62][47]. More