Wisdom Quarterly: American Buddhist Journal: Gratitude? Two rare people in the world

Friday, August 27, 2021

Gratitude? Two rare people in the world

Ajahn Anan, Wat Marp Jan; edited and clarified by Wisdom Quarterly

Elvis was a screw up but a good on because he cherished his aging parents (historydaily.org).

Gratitude and Generosity | Amaravati

Blessings. This Friday we learn Dhamma about goodness and rare people in the world. There are two types of individuals who are hard to find.

One person is the pubbakārī -- one who doing good for others is not seeking immediate benefit in return. This is like a mother and father, who are first to give.

The second type is the kataññūkatavedī -- the person who knows the good one has received and tries to repay it. Some children know the good mother and father have done, and with gratitude one attempts to repay the favor.

Word by Word three language translation PDF (mcu.ac.th)

These people are rare and hard to find in the world. The Buddha taught that one who practices in this way has a blessing in life.

Being a mother or father, for example, a person might be a pubbakārī, in that one wishes good for children. Raising them, one cherishes them. One does one's best to give a child a good education so that later such children can look after themselves.

A child may grow up and reflects on the good that was done for one, and one may try to repay this kindness and love. One may even help one's own parents if possible. For example, one may continue family traditions. Or one practices to be worthy of any inheritance. Even after parents have passed away, one performs merit and dedicates it to them.

A parent as a pubbakari loves one's child and helps that child. How? One may restrain a child from doing harm or establish that child in goodness. One teaches that child a skill or occupation, or helps the child find a suitable partner, or gives the child an inheritance when the time is right.

So a person, calling to mind and reflecting on the good one has received, tries to repay it. Such a person has gratitude and is rare in the world.

One knows the value of the good others have done for one's sake, and one honors that goodness. One is not careless and does not put off what should be done for parents and others.

Why? One does not wait because life is uncertain. There may be no time left to give back to parents while they are alive. Or when one finally becomes aware of what one should do, it may be too late.

I, Moses, approve of caring for parents!

We see in society that there are many children who fail to express gratitude towards their parents.

There are many news stories about a mother who has contracted Covid-19, but the child does not dare to get close to look after her. One does not even extend a hand to give food. One calls various organizations to do it instead.

Later when the organization enquires, it finds that the person is a mother with children but they have no consideration to even help bring the food to offer. Helpers in those organizations feel bad that there are children like this.

They themselves, though these are not their parents, are striving to help the best they can. Even though the people they’re helping aren’t related to them, they are fully willing to help, whereas the person’s own child is too scared to help his or her own mother or father.

There are lots of people like this in society. They are not rare. As the pandemic spread, we see mothers worry for their children with love.

Possibly, because of one’s merits and spiritual qualities ("perfections"), one avoids infection even though one is close to someone infected. There are cases of being close to someone who is sick and not getting sick.

The mind is this way. Consideration of father and mother is great. If we tried to express the virtues of a father and mother, it would be difficult. It would be difficult to fully describe it here.

The Buddha taught that he had built up merit and the perfection of giving (dana-parami) as the Bodhisatta, the Buddha-to-be.

He practiced, like in the lifetime when he was Suvvanasama, who had blind parents. The Bodhisatta felt bad that his parents were blind, but he was happy that he had a chance to look after them. He did so with full effort without being deficient in any way.

Building up goodness like this is a foundation. The foundation of goodness comes from sacrifices we make. This progresses to become morality or virtue (sila). Then this progresses to the qualities of mindfulness and wisdom. It progresses to deeply knowing and understanding the Dhamma.

Even though one does not come to a monastery, one sends strength of mind there. This counts as something excellent arising in life, when we build goodness and cultivate our minds/hearts.

The Buddha loved his kids (Rahula, Ananda).

The Buddha developed Ten Perfections (paramis or Sanskrit paramitas) until they were full in every respect. With this parami of giving (letting go to benefit others) complete, he could finally attain to becoming a self-awakened buddha.

Giving (dana) excellent things while we walk the path towards nirvana means that when we are reborn in whatever life, we will have everything complete in all respects and in all things. So be determined.

Help in this time of economic crisis and pandemic disaster by establishing mindfulness (in the sense of systematic contemplation), recollecting the virtues of the Buddha, Dharma, and Sangha.

Set the heart/mind directly and firmly on the Buddha, recollecting: “I have been reborn into this life, so may I recollect the Buddha as my highest guide (sarana) and my protection. Let the Enlightened One be the strength in my heart.”

May all lay Buddhists, whether living near or far, whether in Thailand or overseas, recollect the virtues of the Buddha as an object of mind.

This shortens to Buddho, Dhammo, Sangho, Buddho, Dhammo, Sangho, Buddho, Dhammo, Sangho. May this make us safe and protect us, keeping us free from all dangers so that we may be healthy and complete in strength of body. Be determined to build goodness like this.

May everyone grow in blessings!