To a Father on Dying (sutra)

Ven. Thanissaro (trans.), Nakula Sutra (AN 6.16); Dhr. Seven, Amber Larson, Wisdom Quarterly

Hey, dad, remember that time you left? - Yes, Rahula. Remember, I came back. - I know.

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The Buddha, his monk son, and Ven. Ananda

Once the Blessed One [the Buddha] was staying among the Bhaggas in the Deer Park at Bhesakala Grove, near Crocodile Haunt. At that time the householder [Buddhist lay devotee] Nakula's father was diseased, in pain, severely ill.

And Nakula's mother said to him: "Don't be worried as you die, householder. Death is painful for one who is worried. The Blessed One has criticized being worried at the time of death.

"Now it may be that you are thinking, 'Nakula's mother will not be able to support the children or maintain the household after I'm gone,' but you should not view things in that way. I am skilled at spinning cotton and carding matted wool. I can support the children and maintain the household after you are gone. So be not worried as you die, householder. Death is painful for one who is worried. The Blessed One has criticized being worried at the time of death.
 
"Now it may be that you are thinking, 'Nakula's mother will take another husband after I am gone,' but you should not view things in that way. You know as well as I how my fidelity [restraint, sexual conduct appropriate for a householder, as opposed to sexual misconduct] has been constant for the past 16 years. So be not worried as you die, householder. Death is painful for one who is worried. The Blessed One has criticized death when one is worried.
 
"Now it may be that you are thinking, 'Nakula's mother will have no desire to go see the Blessed One, to go see the community of monastics, after I am gone,' but you should not view things in that way. I will have an even greater desire to go see the Blessed One, to go see the community of monastics after you are gone. So be not worried as you die, householder. Death is painful for one who is worried. The Blessed One has criticized being worried at the time of death.
 

Bowing: ancient sign of respect in India.

"Now it may be that you are thinking, 'Nakula's mother will not act fully in accordance with the precepts after I am gone,' but you should not view things in that way. To the extent that the Blessed One has white-clad householder female disciples who act fully in accordance with the precepts, I am one of them. If anyone doubts or denies this, let him go ask the Blessed One, the Worthy One, the rightly Awakened One, who is staying among the Bhaggas in the Deer Park at Bhesakala Grove, near Crocodile Haunt. So be not worried as you die, householder. Death is painful for one who is worried. The Blessed One has criticized being worried at the time of death.
 
"Now it may be that you are thinking, 'Nakula's mother will not attain inner tranquility and insight after I am gone,' but you should not view things in that way. To the extent that the Blessed One has white-clad householder female disciples who attain these, I am one of them. If anyone doubts or denies this, let him go ask the Blessed One, the Worthy One, the rightly Awakened One, who is staying among the Bhaggas in the Deer Park at Bhesakala Grove, near Crocodile Haunt. So be not worried as you die, householder. Death is painful for one who is worried. The Blessed One has criticized being worried at the time of death.
 
"Now it may be that you are thinking, 'Nakula's mother will not reach firm ground in this Doctrine and Discipline, will not attain a firm foothold, will not attain consolation, overcome all doubts, dispel her perplexity, reach fearlessness or gain independence from others with regard to the Teacher's message,' but you should not view things in that way.

• NOTE: Although this description is a clear reference to stream entry, the first stage of enlightenment, it also suggests the final step, arhatship, in that she has gained independence from others (i.e., does not rely on a teacher for what she now knows directly). Of course, stream entry is tantamount to arhatship in that it is only a matter of time (no more than seven rebirths) before full enlightenment and nirvana.

"To the extent that the Blessed One has white-clad householder female disciples who reach firm ground in this Doctrine and Discipline, attain a firm foothold, attain consolation, overcome their doubts, dispel their perplexity, reach fearlessness, and gain independence from others with regard to the Teacher's message, I am one of them. If anyone doubts or denies this, let him go ask the Blessed One, the Worthy One, the rightly Awakened One who is staying among the Bhaggas in the Deer Park at Bhesakala Grove, near Crocodile Haunt. So be not worried as you die, householder. Death is painful for one who is worried. The Blessed One has criticized being worried at the time of death."
 
While Nakula's father the householder was being exhorted by Nakula's mother in this way, his illness was immediately allayed. And he recovered from his disease. That was how Nakula's father's disease was abandoned.
 

Nakula's father, you are very fortunate to have Nakula's mother as a noble friend.

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Then, soon after the householder Nakula's father had recovered from being sick, not long after his recovery from this illness, he went leaning on a stick to see the Blessed One.

A wise father supports his wife.

On arriving he bowed and sat respectfully to one side. As he was sitting there, the Blessed One said to him, "It is your gain, your great gain, householder, that you have Nakula's mother -- sympathetic and wishing for your welfare -- as your counselor and instructor. To the extent that I have white-clad householder female disciples who act fully in accordance with the precepts, she is one of them.

"To the extent that I have white-clad householder female disciples who attain inner tranquility and insight, she is one of them. To the extent that I have white-clad householder female disciples who reach firm ground in this Doctrine and Discipline, attain a firm foothold, attain consolation, overcome their doubts, dispel their perplexity, reach fearlessness, and gain independence from others with regard to the Teacher's message, she is one of them.

"It is your gain, your great gain, householder, that you have Nakula's mother -- sympathetic and wishing for your welfare -- as your counselor and instructor."

• Also see: SN 55.21; SN 55.22