Monday, October 23, 2023

Why are Church Christians mean? 10 excuses

Jeremy Myers (redeeminggod.com); Crystal Q., Ashley Wells (eds.), Wisdom Quarterly

Why are Christians so mean? 10 excuses church people give for treating others badly
christian jerksChristians are notorious for bad behavior.

Some Christian church people are just downright mean. Why?

In some recent surveys (reported in books like unChristian and They Like Jesus but Not the Church), it appears that most people in American culture believe that Christians are about as trustworthy as car salesmen or lawyers.

And I will admit, I myself can behave pretty badly at times, and many of the Christians I know behave in far worse ways than many of the Unbelievers I know.

I am always amazed at the grace, love, support, and forgiveness that is found among the “Unchurched” that is rarely found among those who regularly go to church. There are numerous contributing factors to this.

Reasons Christians are mean
Die in bliss by being sincere, not a hypocrite.
Some of it is our theology. Many Christians develop a sense of entitlement because we [like our fellow Jews] are the “chosen ones,” the “elite [elect],” the members of the family of God.

We feel this gives us the right to look down upon others who are not one of us. Sometimes, our behavior is a result of our understanding of God’s grace and [guaranteed] forgiveness.

We feel that because God forgives us [in advance] for all our sins, we can treat others in terrible ways, and God will still forgive us. [What choice does He got?]

While it is true that God will forgive us for such behavior, His grace is never a license to treat others so shamefully [Yeah, but, c'mon! Do what'cha want. Go ahead and hate your neighbor, go ahead and cheat a friend, like the song from Billy Jack].

Beware of church folk, Billy Carson.
Then there is the critical, judgmental, legalistic attitude so often taught and practiced in churches. Since we feel we have a corner on the truth and that we are the ones who are always right, this makes us believe that it is our responsibility to be the world’s policemen, going around pointing out where people are wrong and how they are sinning.

This is rarely received well by anyone, especially when we have glaringly obvious sins ["missing the mark"] in our own life.

Mean Girls: We're Judeo-Christian
Finally, there is the fact that Christians love to pick and choose which sins are the worst – things like homosexuality or murder – while ignoring sins that are prevalent within our own congregations (which might actually be much worse) – sins like gluttony, greed, and pride [arrogance, conceit].

The watching world sees our blatant hypocrisy and criticizes us in return for our unjustified criticism of them.

But over the years, as I have personally engaged in hypocritical and sinful behavior, and as I have watched other Christians do the same, I have found that there are several excuses we give for our poor treatment of other people and for sin in our own lives.

When we treat others badly, we give excuses for why our treatment of them is justified. Here are the top ten reasons I could think of:

1. We Christians are sinners, too
condemnationThere are other versions of this excuse such as, “Hey! Nobody’s perfect!” or “I’m not perfect, just forgiven.” The idea behind this excuse is that the watching world has put unrealistic expectations on us as Christians.

We complain that they seem to think we should live perfect lives, which is impossible. So when we sin, and our sin is pointed out to us, we excuse our actions by reminding others that we are sinners, too. Theologically, this is correct. [Is it?!]

But such a statement should never be used to excuse our sin. When our sin is pointed out to us, either by a Christian or non-Christian, the proper response is not, “Hey, I’m a sinner, too, so get off my back about my behavior” but rather should be, “You know what? You are correct. I messed up. I am sorry. Thanks for pointing that out. With God’s help [and maybe some of my own effort], I will do better next time.”

2. It’s nothing personal; it’s just business
Sometimes people say, “This has nothing to do with my Christianity!” Christians who say these things reveal a deep misunderstanding of what following Jesus is all about.

For a follower of Jesus, there is no such thing as “it’s just business.” Truly following Jesus requires that we make changes in all aspects of life... More (507 Comments)

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