Saturday, March 15, 2025

Happy National Panda Day (3/16)

Don't harass me, Big Panda. I do NOT consent. No means no, not maybe, so back off.
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China loves mythological figures like pandas
Although pandas, a kind of creature like the tiny sun bear but subsisting almost exclusively on nutritious bamboo shoots (as served in good Chinese restaurants), are best known for their opposition to sexual harassment, it wasn't always that way. They were an utter myth, like Sasquatch, until someone trudged out into the woods, killed a specimen, and conclusively proved they really exist in more than just the locals' lore.

No, Panda, you're getting too excited! (Ali Ex)
Now, numerous Sasquatch have been gunned down, and it didn't "prove" anything because the U.S. government already knows without a doubt that these hominids exist in every state but are keeping the secret anyway, even if some USFS material says otherwise. Unlike the charismatic megafauna of U.S. forests, these creatures, which come in many varieties around the world, can be dangerous, monstrous, all too human, and best kept under wraps since they are entering and exiting this dimension by various means (portals, prison planet ships, and their own preternatural super abilities).

Petey the Sexual Harassment Panda debuts on South Park, mm'kay?
  • China loves mythological figures who are bigger than life: Cosmic Buddhas like Amitabha and Vairocana, Indian missionary Bodhidharma, Goddess Kwan Yin, Ksitigarbha in Hell, Yeren (Wild Man in the woods), and big pandas.
National Panda Day: March 16

Baby panda boy on Pinterest
Every year on March 16th, we celebrate the fluffiest, bamboo-munching bears that are a source of national pride for China.

There are two subspecies of panda, the Giant, black-and-white panda, and the golden ‘Qinling panda’ – a much smaller, brown subspecies of panda, discovered in 1985 in the mountain ranges of the southern Shaanxi Province in China.

In the wilderness, giant pandas live only in the remote, mountainous regions of China [like some kind of hiding Smallfoot no one used to seriously believe in].

As of 2019, due to rapidly growing population numbers, the status of pandas was upgraded from “endangered” species to “vulnerable” species. Still, it is reported that there are fewer than 2,000 pandas left in the wild, due to habitat loss, farming, fur hunting, and other factors [like trying to teach them kung fu and getting them killed by Hollywood in the process, with drug and alcohol abuse for the ones who find fame ;,)].


Pandas only live about 15 to 20 years in the wild, but those in captivity may live even longer. Panda bears play an important part in the ecosystem of China’s bamboo forests, by spreading seeds, and therefore, growing new vegetation, which serves humans, animals, and humanimals (like the Yeren), and animals.

That’s why it is important to protect the panda and its environment, aside from their intrinsic right to live and exist on the animal plane, which is shared with humans and the human plane in Buddhism.
Extinction events are possible as in the past
One factor contributing to their endangered status is the low birth rate for pandas. Considering that female pandas are only fertile two or three days of the year, it makes sense that reproduction in the wild is more difficult for this species.

There are about 27 zoos worldwide that imprison or indefinitely detain protect giant pandas and foster artificial environments to encourage reproduction.

The most important factor for preserving wild pandas is to protect their environment, especially bamboo forests, their main source of nutrition. More
  • National Today, March 16, 2025; South Park (Comedy Central); CC Liu, Crystal Q., Seth Auberon (eds.), Wisdom Quarterly

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