Showing posts with label life in hell. Show all posts
Showing posts with label life in hell. Show all posts

Saturday, October 25, 2025

Nightmare Before Xmas w/ Danny Elfman


As fans of The Simpsons, the Forbidden Zone, The Mystic Knights of the Oingo Boingo, experimental new wave and punk, Oingo Boingo, Tim Burton animation, and Danny Elfman, how could we miss "The Nightmare Before Christmas"? It's in town tonight with full orchestra for a good sing-along. This is what it looked like last year: Danny Elfman - Hollywood Bowl - Los Angeles - 11-2-2024

Forbidden Zone: Director's Cut (Rated R) Sexy Frenchy falls into an insane underworld ruled by a horny little king and his jealous queen in another dimension. Only Danny Elfman's brother really knows.

It's a world of shapeshifters
Disney Tim Burton's The Nightmare Before Christmas in concert featuring Danny Elfman singing as Jack, Janelle Monae singing as Sally, Keith David singing as Oogie Boogie, Riki Lindhome singing as Shock, and John Stamos singing as Lock with incredible eye-popping projections that bring Halloween Town to life.

The holiday classic celebrates 10 years since its first show at the iconic venue! Conductor John Mauceri, founding director of the Hollywood Bowl Orchestra, will once again be leading the full orchestra and choir performing the film’s full score as the special guests perform the film's acclaimed songs live, plus an unforgettable virtuosic interlude with violinist Sandy Cameron.

Get to the Bowl early to enjoy the Hollywood Bowl/Halloween Town transformation with special pre-show activities including a costume contest (Tim Burton-inspired costumes are encouraged!), unique photo opportunities, and trick-or-treating stations. Programs, artists, dates, prices, and availability subject to change. Ticket limits may apply. All sales are final. Saturday and Sunday night, Oct. 25th and 26th. hollywoodbowl.com

Monday, April 7, 2025

Cartoon War: Family Guy versus ALL


Darkest Family Guy episode (banned from TV)
(Patrick Cc:) April 7, 2025: ✔️ Social media ✔️ Instagram: patrickcctv TikTok: tiktok.com/@patrickcctv... Twitter: patrickcctv 🎧 Stream music 🎧 hoo.be/patrickcctv 💧Second channel💧 @patcc 👾 Discord👾 discordFamily Guy survives Cartoon Wars Part I and Cartoon Wars Part II. Who would Beavis & Butt-Head side with, King of the Hill or Seth MacFarlane? Oh, yeah. How about Cartman?

Monday, January 27, 2025

"The Shaman" (poem)

THE SHAMAN
Plant uses (Santa Monica Bay Audubon Society)
The shaman climbed the mountain, gathered sacred flowering herbs and berries along the way -- Datura moonflowers, toloache, Brugmansia angel's-trumpets, Salvia apiana kasiile sage, toyon, holly -- until delirium overwhelmed him with lurid and ecstatic visions of hell and heaven. Then he returned to the human world.

Tongva Culture Tour, Summer 2005 (Takwish)
Word spread of him. People asked, "Is it true, as they say, that you have seen hell?"

"I have."

"What's it like?"

"It's hideous, ironic, horror beyond imagination," the shaman winced to relive, nearly blinded by his recollection:

When do we eat? - We're eaten.
"There's food everywhere, but no one eats, and drink aplenty, but no one drinks. There are long wooden spoons with which to partake, but their bodies have only tiny appendages for arms, too short to bring such elongated spoons up to their shriveled lips. Parched slaver forms ashes in their mouths, and bodies waste away. Struggle as they might, everything goes to wrack and ruin. They bellow in agony."

The people shrank away, with growing acreage dedicated to burying their discarded surplus, collapsing under smoldering heaps of trash.


Forced conversion (Museum of the SFV)
"And heaven?" asked the hopeful. "Is it true, as they say, that you have seen heaven?"

"I have."

"And what's it like?" they pleaded.

"Heaven," the shaman revealed, "is exactly the same."

"What!?" cried the people. "The same? Surely that is no heaven!"

How they faced one another.
"There is one difference," the shaman went on to explain.

"In heaven, there is an abundance of food and drink, long wooden spoons, and bodies with tiny appendages too short to bring these utensils up to their mouths. But the beings there, without hesitation, use the long spoons to feed one another.

"There is no want. No request goes unanswered, no desire unfulfilled. Acts of kindness overflow as do the spoons. Spoon fed and cared for, there are continuous cries of gratitude and rejoicing as beings fall over one another to be the first to give.

Time to eat? - For us? - No, for them.
"There is food, and they eat. There is drink, and they drink, and they relish their bounty and diversity. They care for one another, nourish one another, thank one another. The sweetness of their caresses, gentleness of their words, and kindness of their eyes," the shaman wept to recall, "make the place so beautiful that I only wish I could show one world to the other."

  • Seven (poem), Ashley Wells (ed.), CC Liu (graphic design), Wisdom Quarterly

Friday, August 9, 2024

Hawaii: Paradise turned to Hell (video)


Hawaii: Paradise Turned to Hell
(Tyler Oliveira) Aug. 7, 2024: Get 20% off DeleteMe US consumer plans at: joindeleteme.com/TYLER and use promo code TYLER at checkout. DeleteMe International Plans: international.joindeleteme.com. Join Patreon for $5/month: tyleroliveira. Gonna start uploading more extended/uncensored cuts, early access to all the videos watched here, and exclusive content YouTube will not allow anyone to watch on YouTube. Thanks for watching elsewhere! Special thanks to David & Jaimin, YouTube: @davidmariusofficial, Uncle Walter: @walterkanamu8597.

Friday, June 28, 2024

Hitler on nat'l embarrassment: The Debate


Hitler reacts to the Biden-Trump presidential debate
(Hitler Rants Parodies) June 28, 2024: Adolf nails it on this one. Mr. Hitler reacts to Pres. Biden’s bad  miserable deplorable debate performance in the first 2024 presidential debate. #downfallparodies #hrpdownfallparodies #meme

Robotic moron in a body mask suit or just an absentee body with a walk-in spirit under control


Highlights from the (CIA-backed) CNN presidential debate
(On Demand News) June 28, 2024: Don Trump and Joe Biden both accused each other of being criminals during a fiery debate between the two presidential hopefuls at the CNN Presidential Debate. Here are the highlights. #trump #biden #usa

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Jon Stewart's debate analysis: Trump's blatant lies and Biden's senile moments | The Daily Show
(The Daily Show) June 27, 2024: Jon Stewart goes live after CNN's presidential debate to unpack Biden's senior moments and Trump's blatant fibs. #DailyShow #Debate
.
I'm down, but 45 is still mad.
RFK Jr., save the nation. Any honest assessment of the debate debacle has to conclude that Biden lost. Whether Trump won is debatable, but Biden lost it. The national embarrassment is that he is currently president, one we never wanted. He won on fear of Trump. That Trump was ever president is a national embarrassment. Another Trump term, particularly after his crimes in office refusing to leave? Hell No. More Biden humiliation? Oh No.
RFK Jr. reacts to disastrous debate

This is Biden? Hollow beady eyed skin mask
If there were performance-enhancing drugs in use at Thursday's presidential debate, there weren't enough, according to The Daily Show's Jon Stewart. Pres. Biden's stumbles and former Pres. and current felon Trump's blatant lies [claiming he didn't have sex with porn star Stormy while his wife was with their newborn or that he didn't call soldiers losers and suckers] showed "both of these men should be using performance-enhancing drugs" — "as much of it as they can get, as many times a day, as their bodies will allow," the host joked in a live episode immediately following the debate. Meanwhile, Jimmy Kimmel Live guest host Martin Short dedicated a musical number to Trump.

Ashley Biden, daughter of Joe and Jill
We have been saying again and again, Genocide Joe Biden is an incestuous child molester (same as Trump, just ask their daughters), a PizzaGate participant, and then there's the genocide, the endless war economy, the paralyzed Alzheimer's senility and dementia, the body doubles, the demonic possession (or walk ins who take control after half a century in politics). He clearly does not run the country, so who does? What CIA committee was put together to rule, and why did their station (CNN) bring him down in this way?


Martin Short sings
(Jimmy Kimmel Live) Martin Short sings to winner Trump

Dems scramble to limit damage done by Joey B
What to call his performance at the first debate. He looked like a man in a puffy mask and sounded like SLEEPY SANDPAPER. Ugly Trump was lying left and right. He can't help himself. With 40,000 known lies before, what is the chance he can be honest? It's the reason he avoids taking the stand at every single prosecution. He'd only get himself in more trouble. And WHY doesn't he take the stand when he wants to so badly? He lies about that, too.

Who will replace Biden? (TYT)
  • Eds., Wisdom Quarterly; Jon Stewart, The Daily Show; The Young Turks (TYT); Lincoln Project; Martin Short (Jimmy Kimmel Live); Robert F. Kennedy Jr. (CNN), Wisdom Quarterly

Saturday, April 8, 2023

How I see the USA after years in Europe

 
 
How I see the US after living in Europe for five years
(David Wen) Feb. 19, 2023. UNITED STATES - What is America like after experiencing life in Europe? Everything's BIG. Consumerism. Gun violence. Homelessness. Police abuse. "What do you do for work?" This is how I see the USA after living in the Netherlands for five years. Sometimes it takes leaving a place for one to truly understand the pros and cons of that place. There are things I love and dislike about the US. Enjoy this short movie. 🇺🇸🇳🇱 David 📽 
 
OTHER VIDEOS
🙏 TO SUPPORT MY WORK: PayPal donations: paypal.me/davidswen. Buy me a coffee: buymeacoffee.com/davidwen 
 
😁 WHO I AM: I'm David, a Californian living in Amsterdam. I make videos about life in the Dutch world, hiking and traveling, and the Camino de Santiago. 🔸 If you live in the Netherlands, I'd love to interview you and hear your story. Email: hidavidwen@gmail.com

Monday, February 20, 2023

I'm too lazy: standup comedian Jim Gaffigan

 
Jim Gaffigan: “I’m Too Lazy” (full special stand up)
(Comedy Central) Premiered Dec. 2, 2022. #JimGaffigan #StandUp In this classic Comedy Central Presents special, standup comedian Jim Gaffigan talks about being from Indiana (Midwest), his own laziness, manatees (sea cows), and more.
Paramount+ is here: Stream favorite shows now. Try it FREE at bit.ly/3qyOeOf. Original air date: July 12, 2000. ABOUT: Comedy Central Presents are half-hour specials showcasing some of the best up-and-coming comedians of the moment. The show was a pivotal stepping stone for many of today’s stand up stars, including Dave Chappelle, Patton Oswalt, Amy Schumer, Jim Gaffigan, Kevin Hart, Zach Galifianakis, Dane Cook, Bill Burr, Wanda Sykes, and Maria Bamford.

Friday, December 23, 2022

Reign In Blood: The SLAYER Story (doc)


Reign In Blood: The Slayer Story ┃ Documentary
(RAWMUSICTV) Premiered Dec. 9, 2022 On October 7th, 1986, one of the most iconic records of a generation would send shockwaves through the music industry.

Finally, Beavis, something worth listening to!
It was such a controversial album, radio stations wouldn’t play it and Columbia Records refused to release it due to a song called "Angel of Death." Even when the record was released by Geffen, they refused to even put their logo on it.

That album would be called Reign in Blood by Slayer. Arguably the most influential thrash metal band of all time.

They’ve been attacked by religious groups, accused of being Satanic and faced a lawsuit that involved murder. Yet despite this, they are now a household name with 12 studio albums under their belt, millions of records sold worldwide, and a legacy that will surely live on through the ages.

Tori Amos improves on the hit song by switching perspective

Slayer's album covers alone were enough to trigger backlash from labels, parents, and Christian groups around the world, some of their song titles and lyrics would even have them pinned as Nazi sympathizers. We’ve seen similar stories about bands having links to Satanism when Black Sabbath arrived in 1968 and KISS in 1973 when people thought it was an acronym for "Knights In Satan's Service."

Slayer, however, played this to their advantage, they wanted to shock people, they wanted to stand out from the crowd, that’s exactly what they did, and this is their story.

When Slayer ruined the Grammys

Tuesday, September 8, 2020

Is life disappointing and painful?

Ven. Piyadassi Thera edited and expanded by Pat Macpherson, Dhr. Seven, Wisdom Quarterly

What is the cause of disappointment/pain?
Life, according to the right understanding of a buddha, is NOT "suffering," but it is unsatisfactory (dukkha), disappointing, and suffused with a lack-of-fulfillment. It cannot be satisfactory, though we think it can, and it has the potential for great pain and misery.

Is there pleasure? Of course! Is there happiness (sukha)? Yes! Yet, for all that, life (pursuing our cravings) is not able to fulfill us, satisfy us, allay our pains, except that pleasure sometimes distracts us.

"Suffering" in English means one thing, and it is not what the Buddha was talking about. It is too powerful a translation that misleads. Many translators use it because it does not shrink back from the problem of physical pain and psychological disappointment. Pain is based on ignorance, delusion, wrong view (avijja). That is not to say it does not exist. That is to say it does exist and is rooted in this mental defilement, the greatest source of suffering. So what is the solution? It is enlightenment, wisdom, insight in the Truth.

Ignorance is the experiencing of that which is unworthy of experiencing — namely harmfulness. Furthermore, it is the non-perception of the fabricated nature of the Five Aggregates. It is:
  • the non-perception of sense-organs and their objects in their objective natures,
  • the non-perception of the emptiness (impersonal nature) of the elements,
  • the non-perception of the dominant nature of the sense faculties,
  • the non-perception of the thus-ness — the such-ness, infallibility — of the Four Noble Truths.
And the Five Hindrances (pañca nivaranani) are the nutriment or necessary condition for this ignorance. They are called "hindrances" because they completely close in, cut off, and obstruct liberating insight. They hinder the understanding of the way to liberation from all suffering (disappointment, pain, unsatisfactoriness).

The Five Hindrances
  1. Sensuality (kamacchanda)
  2. Ill-will (vyapada)
  3. Obduracy of mind and mental factors (thinamiddha)
  4. Restlessness and worry (uddhacca-kukkucca), and
  5. Skeptical doubt (vicikiccha).
What is the nutriment of these hindrances? The three harmful modes of life (tini duccaritani): 1) bodily, 2) verbal, and 3) mental wrong-doing.

This threefold nutriment is, in turn, nourished by non-restraint of the senses (indriya asamvaro), which is explained by the Commentary as the admitting of lust and hate [passion and aversion] into the six sense-organs of eye, ear, nose, tongue, body, and mind.

The nutriment of non-restraint is shown to be lack of mindfulness and of complete awareness (asati asampajañña). In the context of nutriment, the drifting away of the object (dhamma, thing) — the lapsing, from the mind, of the knowledge of the Three Universal Marks or Characteristics of Existence:
  1. impermanence (change)
  2. unsatisfactoriness (suffering)
  3. impersonal nature (not self).
And forgetfulness of the true nature of things is the reason for non-restraint. It is when one does not bear in mind the transience and the other characteristics of things that one allows oneself all kinds of liberties in thought, speech, and deed. Two give rein to unskillful imagery (thought).

Lack of complete awareness is lack of these four:
  1. complete awareness of purpose (sattha sampajañña),
  2. of suitability (sappaya sampajañña),
  3. of resort (gocara sampajañña), and
  4. of non-delusion (asammoha sampajañña).
When one does something while lacking right purpose, when one looks at things or does actions (performs karma) that do not help the growth of the good,
  • when one does things inimical to improvement,
  • when one forgets the dhamma (the Truth, the teachings, the Dharma), which is the real resort of one who strives,
  • when one deludedly takes hold of things believing them to be pleasant (able to satisfy or able to fulfill one), beautiful, permanent, or substantial —
  • when one behaves in this way, then also non-restraint is nourished.
And below this lack of mindfulness and complete awareness lies unsystematic reflection (ayoniso manasikara). The books say unsystematic reflection (the opposite of wise reflection) is reflection that is off the right course.

That is to say, one takes the impermanent as permanent, the painful as pleasurable, the impersonal as a self, the unskillful as skillful (unwholesome as wholesome, unprofitable as profitable, bad as good).

The constant rolling-on through rebirths that is samsara is rooted in unsystematic consideration. When unsystematic consideration increases, it fulfils two things, nescience (ignorance) and craving for more becoming (rebirth).

Ignorance being present, the origination of this entire mass of suffering (disappointment) comes to be. Thus a person who is a shallow thinker (lacking systematic consideration), like a ship drifting at the wind's will, like a herd of cattle swept into the whirl pool of a river, like an ox yoked to a cycling wheel-contraption, goes on revolving in the cycle of rebirth, samsara.

And it is said that imperfect confidence (assaddhiyam) in the Buddha, the Dharma, and the Sangha is the condition that develops unsystematic reflection. And imperfect confidence is due to non-hearing of the Dharma (the teaching of a fully awakened buddha), the Dharma (asaddhamma savanam).

Finally, one does not hear the Dharma through lack of contact with the wise (those in the stages of enlightenment), through not approaching and keeping company with the good (asappurisa sansevo).

Therefore, want of noble friendship (kalyana-mittata) appears to be the basic reason for the ills of the world. Conversely, the basis and nutriment of all good is shown to be noble friendship. For it furnishes one with the nourishment of the sublime Dharma, which in turn produces confidence in the Triple Gem (tiratana): the Buddha, Dharma, and Sangha.

When one has confidence in the Triple Gem, there come into existence profound or systematic consideration, mindfulness and complete awareness (sati-sampajjana), restraint of the senses, the three good modes of life, the Four Foundations (or Arousings) of Mindfulness, the Seven Factors of Enlightenment, and deliverance through wisdom, one after another, in order [5]. More

Thursday, April 16, 2020

LIVE: Iconic comedy moments (video)

Comedy Central Roasts (livestream); Seth Auberon, Ashley Wells (eds.), Wisdom Quarterly
WARNING: Wrong speech, hatred, malice, invective, venom, obscenity, profanity, cussing, satire!

🔴STREAMING NOW: Iconic Comedy Central ROAST Moments
Let's stay in and on voluntary house arrest/lockdown on the most beautiful spring day of the year, with snow on the surrounding mountains, clear skies (no chemtrails), clean air (reduced emissions and particulate matter from the smoke of burning barbeque flesh from restaurant chimneys, and the odd fragrance of the Midwest.

Nevertheless, let's warm ourselves with some classic burns. Let's binge on some of the best flesh-searing roasts. Brought to us by a corporate sponsor. Proud partner of Global Citizen for One World #TogetherAtHome. #ComedyCentral. #Roast. Category: Comedy.

Wow, humans are out of their minds with hate.
Seasoned roasters from Martha Stewart to Jeff Ross, Bill Hader to Nikki Glaser, Ludicrous to Snoop Dogg, Lisa Lampinelli to Sarah Silverman, Seth MacFarlane to Aziz Ansari, Shaquille O'Neal to... as they take down fellow celebrities in the Roasts of Justin Bieber, James Franco, Alec Baldwin, Donald Trump, and more.

Tuesday, June 12, 2018

White Male Suicidal Tendencies (video)

Matt Groening; Nicki Swift; Suicidal Tendencies; Dr. Joel Wallach (criticalhealthnews.com); Crystal Quintero, Seth Auberon, Ashley Wells, Pat Macpherson, Pfc. Sandoval, Wisdom Quarterly
"Hell for Beginners" (Life in Hell by Matt Groening, inventor of The Simpsons, 1986)


Mike Muir and his band, Suicidal Tendencies, perform "Institutionalized" talking about his life.
Anthony Bourdain gets tricked into eating ANUS on his show, No Reservations (or Parts Unknown), warthog anus to be specific. He puts it in his mouth and tastes shytza as the indigenous menfolk laugh at the white man to be so stupid as to put an ass in his mouth.

The Double Life of Anthony Bourdain
Nicki Swift, Oct. 11, 2016From "bad-boy" drug addict chef to world-traveling TV host, Anthony Bourdain has led a sad and wild life. He was still a relatively unknown executive chef in NY at age 43, before hitting the big time as the author of Kitchen Confidential. Now he's traveled the world hosting TV shows, won a few Emmys, and even earned a Peabody Award. But how much do we really know about this suicidal guy? Let's take a bite out of his double life: drug and alcohol abuse | 0:25 Opinionated | 0:58 Family and Fitness | 2:03 Mystery meat | 2:51 Financial success | 3:42. More

(Parts Unknown) System of a Down's Serj Tankian is Armenian, and Bourdain visits the beautiful country in the Caucasus Mountain range.

CriticalHealthNews.com, Youngevity.com.
The cause of the rise in suicidal tendencies, particularly in white males in the US today, but not limited to white males, as we see with the suicide of multi-millionaire Kate Spade, was revealed last night by Dr. Joel Wallach of Critical Health News. it is a mineral deficiency, which causes a downward spiraling of health until suicide seems like a good answer. Other deficiencies in utero cause other anomalies, such as homosexual tendencies. Yes, it's not the devil or the way millennials are raised but rather our depleted soils and poor processed food diets that lead to many thing we think of as purely social in the wrong-minded "Nature vs. Nurture" debate. The debate is wrong. Social impacts on our nurturing -- prenatal care, postpartum depression and child rearing, nutrition, food habits, and so on -- play as big a role as biology, epigenetics, DNA codes, poisoning, malnutrition and obesity...



We rue the day Noory took over C2C.
So lame Operative George Noory finally asked an important question, "Which mineral?" Dr. Wallach, for good reason, does not like to reveal the exact mineral because people will necessarily misunderstand and think that simply by taking that mineral, the condition will be resolved. It will not. Minerals are needed in complex of 90 nutrients, with 72 trace minerals. But he made an exception for Noory and told him that it was lithium. Lithium is a naturally occurring mineral that has been studied because out of dumb luck, some people live in places with a lot of it in the ground. And researchers can look at suicide, homicide, domestic abuse, obesity rates and other conditions -- and trace them to the deficiencies in the soil and diets of the actors.

Smug Magazine (Life in Hell)
This can be done on a large scale to find correlations that would otherwise be invisible. Dr. Wallach has looked at more bodies, corpses, and carcasses (animal bodies) than anyone alive, and these autopsies have revealed to him that we need the same 90 nutrients domesticated animals need, and domesticated animals suffer the same nutrition-deficiency-based conditions we think are exclusive to humans. The "holy" water at Lourdes is holy, not only by faith and devas stirring the waters, but by its excess quantities of lithium. So long, Anthony Bourdain. We will hardly miss you, you sad sack addict. Rest in peace, Kate Spade. Thanks for the style, and sorry you were so miserable in your social life while having so much money we all envied you your pathetic life that seemed so glitzy. Thank you, Dr. Wallach, and you too, Noory, for at least having one good regular guest telling the truth about how important nutrition and how we need to go back to throwing our ashes into our gardens and eating our own produce. (Wood ashes contain the trace minerals we are missing in the soil ever since the invention of the light bulb). Remember, as Dr. Thanatos at UCLA used to say, "Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem." What "feels" right is completely wrong, and the person at death realizes the grave mistake that has been made. Life, even a miserable one, is a precious gift that people do not know how they got, so they form the wrong view that it came about for no reason and that it must have been easy to get because they got it without effort. The truth is that it is very, very rare and offers the opportunity to do much good and store up much good karma (punya, merit) that benefits one for many, many lives to come. And many lives will come. Surely you will die and all will be lost here, but this empty process will carry on, and "you" will be born and reborn again and again in a seemingly endless series of births, good and bad, high and low. This process is called samsara, the "wandering on" in search of pleasure. Bringing it to cessation would be blissful, or making merit so that future lives are exquisite would be far better. But we squander those chances, make little to no effort to understand (to gain "right view") and therefore spiral down. Suicide is a kind of killing, a murder we do not have the right to perform, and the consequences are miserable when they finally come to fruition. If dying with a hateful thought (dosa citta, aversion mind-moment), we will reappear in a ghost or hellish realm. If we do not die immediately but linger a few moments, that final citta will condition our next rebirth, a function usually performed by our habitual karma, and there -- as here -- we will face the fruits and results of our past and current actions (mental, verbal, and physical). If we had merit, and abundance of good karma, we would enjoy the fruits thereof for a long, long time until they were exhausted. We might even form good habits (the tendency to perform meritorious actions again and again) that would taken us further still. We might even one day hear the liberating Dharma to make an end of this otherwise endless-cycle of wandering. Ah, that would be nirvana!

Monday, July 13, 2015

Republican candidates; Beauty pageant

Pat Macpherson, Pfc. Sandoval, Ashley Wells, Wisdom Quarterly (COMMENTARY); AP.org
Miss Oklahoma Olivia Jordan was crowned Miss USA during the 2015 beauty pageant in Baton Rouge, July 12, 2015. She deftly fielded the interview portion of the competition by saying the U.S. needs to improve race relations and beat out 50 other contestants (AP).
U.S. used to judge cabbages and babies. Who'll win this year? Miss Nevada Brittany McGowan, Miss Maryland Mame Adjei, Miss Rhode Island Anea Garcia, Miss Texas Ylianna Guerra, and Miss Oklahoma Olivia Jordan compete during the 2015 Miss USA beauty pageant (AP).
Who will win? Early returns say it's Fat Cat, Mr. Whiskers (Dan Piraro/bizarro.com)
File photo collage shows 2016 Republican presidential candidates who have officially declared their candidacy as of July 12, 2015. Top row, from left, [shoo in] former Florida Gov. Jeb Bush [of the Bush ruling dynasty], retired neurosurgeon [and black token candidate featured prominently in the collage by placing him first] Ben Carson, New Jersey Gov. Chris Christie, Texas U.S. Sen. Ted Cruz, [token female] former Hewlett-Packard CEO Carly Fiorina, South Carolina U.S. Sen. Lindsey Graham, and former Arkansas Gov. Mike Huckabee. Bottom row, from left, Louisiana Gov. Bobby Jindal, former New York Gov. George Pataki, Kentucky U.S. Sen. Rand Paul, former Texas Gov. Rick Perry, Florida U.S. Sen. Marco Rubio, former U.S. Sen. Rick Santorum, and real estate mogul [and possible neo Nazi] Donald Trump (AP).

Those filthy stupid Mexicans, except for some which I heard can be good... the Trumpenator

El Shorty a.k.a. Kingpin Joaquin Guzman (AP)
Hold the presses! This just in:

Narco-trafficker, cartel kingpin, and all-around mob boss Jack "The Shorty" Gustafson (Joaquin El Chapo Guzman) has "broken out" (i.e., been let out by corrupt officials who are paid off to give the cartel leader a chance to run free and be caught later as another payoff sees to it that the U.S. gets him extradited, imprisoned, and tortured) of a Mexican maximum security prison.

Scale of drug lord's tunnel escape is mind-blowing (newser.com)
.
Get Shorty before he gets me!
While this is an almost entirely bad thing, there is a silver lining. For one thing, illegal drug prices in the U.S. are bound to go down as supply goes up and the economies of scale tilt prices in favor of the consumer. (So, my fellow Americans, let's stop buying and taking drugs).

Moreover, El Shorty is tweeting from his own twitter account, so of course the NSA, CIA, and NSC know exactly where he is and what he's up to -- and he's tweeting one man in particular: That's right, Donald Trump.

Is fraulein Taylor Swift a Nazi?
What he's tweeting is something like, "If you don't stop p*ssing me off, El Trump, you're going to get it!" Now, imagine a smoke-filled room of narcotraficante mobsters, and El Shorty saying to heaven, "Oh, won't someone relieve me of this neo Nazi!"

A mobster overhears and hoping to get a nice dispensation from the Boss (el jefe) flies to Florida and oh-no, hello, Mr. Trump, and goodbye.

They awoke to find "A World Gone Mad" (Tom Tomorrow/thismodernworld.com)

.
Everybody into the pool! Why is the 2016 GOP field so big?
Republicans hate Democrats like it's   Bloods vs. Crips except no one told Boehner or Pelosi.
.
Closet candidates crash party (LIH)
WASHINGTON, D.C. - Who yelled "everybody into the pool?"

After all the candidate announcements, after all the speculation about who'd go first and who's yet to jump in, one question remains in this summer BEFORE the election year: Why are so many Republicans running for president?

Surely, the soon-to-be-17 announced GOP candidates don't all think they will become president. But it's easy for a politician to get caught up in the hype and yell "cowabunga!" in a year when there's no incumbent seeking re-election and no Republican who seems to have an inside track to the nomination [other than the ultimate insider and rightwing media candidate Bush].

RepubliCrats (Tom Tomorrow/TMW)
Plus, it's easier than ever to make a credible run for president, thanks to the equalizing effects of social media and digital fundraising, and with looser federal rules in place on raising money. The apt question for an ambitious Republican this year seems to be: Well, why not?

With a tweet that "I'm in," [Koch Brothers' favorite] Wisconsin Gov. Scott Walker added his name to the list on Monday [today]. Ohio Gov. John Kasich, and former Virginia Gov. Jim Gilmore are due to follow in coming weeks, bringing the total by summer's end to at least 17.

"Every now and then you have an election cycle that is defined by what can be best described as me-too-ism," says Mo Elleithee, executive director of Georgetown's Institute of Politics and Public Service and a onetime spokesman for Hillary Rodham Clinton's 2008 presidential campaign.

[This is strategic: The more candidates, the easier it is for one to rise to the top on the smallest of margins. So goodbye Rand Paul, hello preselected Bush]. More
    What about me! You owe me this!
  • WQ endorses Rand Paul, but we'll settle for his discredited father or Carly Fiorina, since it's just a figurehead position with no real power. See The Hitch Hikers Guide to the Galaxy for explanation of there being no real power vested in the office for a person so eager to rule that s/he will do anything to get there. Only a person who does not want the job is qualified. So on the Democratic side, consider Bernie Sanders and vote Dr. Jill Stein.
Dawning of the Obvious: Confederate flag or gay marriage? (JenSorensen.com)