31-y.o. techie chooses a monk's life

Why a 31-year old Singaporean techie chose the monk's life

(Handful of Leaves) Oct. 14, 2025: Handful of Leaves Podcast. Rich in Buddhist Singapore, from dating girls to reading about Elon Musk to thinking about politics, he was in search of meaning in his early 20s. All that changed when he read about the Buddha and his monastic followers.

Handful of Leaves had the awesome opportunity to speak with novice Samanera/Anagarika Phra Ryan before he took full ordination. Here’s his story of becoming a Buddhist monk at the prime of his career in Singapore's tech industry.

This is also how young only son Ryan, with family members of a different religious faith, arrived at this path of Buddhist monasticism. #BuddhistWisdom #MindfulLiving #FaithAndPractice

ABOUT: Halfway through his university studies, Ryan embarked on a spiritual journey into the deeper meaning of life and found himself drawn towards Buddhism. It was during a silent retreat in the Australian bush at a Theravada monastery, which marked the beginning of an eight-year journey into monkhood. This is his story.

• 📄 Transcript: bit.ly/hol-phra-ryan

⏱ TIMESTAMPS

• (00:00) – First week as a Buddhist novice (monk-to-be): nervous then relief
• (01:30) – Meeting Ajahn Dhammasiha and first retreats
• (03:00) – Life as an anagarika and his family’s reaction
• (05:00) – Growing up privileged and searching for meaning
• (07:05) – Parents’ and friends’ response to his ordination
• (09:10) – Luang Por’s [Senior Monk's] teaching: life without mindfulness is crazy
• (10:00) – Goal of practice: freeing the mind from clinging/attachment
• (11:15) – Wearing the robe [Banner of the Arahants] and facing “imposter syndrome”
• (12:09) – Choosing Wat Marp Jan [Monastery] under Luang Por [Ven.] Anan

Special thanks to Handful of Leaves' sponsors: Buddhist Youth Network, Lim Soon Kiat, Alvin Chan, Tan Key Seng, Soh Hwee Hoon, Geraldine Tay, Venerable You Guang, Wilson Ng, Diga, Joyce, Tan Jia Yee, Joanne, Suñña, Shuo Mei, Arif, Bernice, Wee Teck, Andrew Yam, Kan Rong Hui, Wei Li Quek, Shirley Shen, Ezra, Joanne Chan, Hsien Li Siaw, Gillian Ang, Wang Shiow Mei, Ong Chye Chye, Melvin, Yoke Kuen, Nai Kai Lee, Amelia Toh, Hannah Law, Shin Hui Chong, Dennis Lee

• 🙏 Become a sponsor: handfulofleaves.life/support

🎬 Editor: Hong Jiayi. ✍️ Transcribers: Cheryl Cheah, Tan Si Jing, Bernice Bay. 🎨 Visuals and Sound: Anton Thorne, Tan Pei Shan, Ang You Shan.

• 📱 Get connected: Ajahn Dhammasiha: @dhammatalksatdhammagiri8724
• Wat Pah Nanachat: watpahnanachat.org
• Wat Marp Jan: @ajahnanan
• Telegram: bit.ly/hol-telegram
• Instagram: bit.ly/hol-instagram-podcast
• Facebook: bit.ly/hol-facebook-podcast
• Spotify: spoti.fi/3w2jfQ1
• Handful of Leaves, Oct. 14, 2025; Pat Macpherson and Dhr. Seven (eds.), Wisdom Quarterly

What are Buddhist monks? (video)

How to become a monk: Why or why not?

Can girls join? - Yes. Bhikkhuni Sangha lives!

Casual practitioners of the Dharma, the Teaching that Leads to Liberation, is a lot like that of a Buddhist monk or nun only more intensive, unrelenting, not easily hidden from. In our ordinary life, we can take a break and get away from ourselves (turn on and drop out), so progress is slow but easier than having to be at it, keeping our nose to the grindstone all the time. By the way, women are not "female monks" (bhikkhus). They are nuns (bhikkhunis). In referring to both simultaneously, we call them monastics. They are all samanas, "wandering ascetics," in the ideal; in practice, many have become temple priests and priestesses like the Brahmin priests of the Buddha's day.

Strive to see ultimate reality (mentality-materiality)

so "letting go" (nekkhamma) happens all by itself,

Pa Auk Sayadaw would say, agreeing with Ajahn Chah

How to become a monk: Why and why not?

(English Buddhist Monk) THAILAND. MAN GIVES UP EVERYTHING. In 2015, aged 47, an English (British) businessman gave up everything and travelled Asia to find true happiness.

Now a Buddhist monk (bhikkhu, samana, bhante), living a simple life in Buddhist Thailand, India, and Sri Lanka, he shares the continuing story.

• How does one become monastic? Ordination (pabbajjā)

ABOUT: Phra Dan (Ven. Dhammarakkhita, Bhikkhu, not yet tens years in the robe to be an Ajahn or official Thai "Teacher") is a Theravada Buddhist monk who lived in India from 2020, Thailand, and now Sri Lanka.

Dan was born in Sussex, England, in 1967. Educated by French Catholic monks, he was a successful businessman in estate agency and financial services during the 1980s and 1990s, married, divorced with three adult sons.

The year 2000 marked change and travel, including a visit to South Africa, returning to the UK in 2003 to continue different work and business activities until 2012.

Gradually materialistic values turned to renunciation (nekkhamma), intentional simplicity, and meditation, living nomadically in an old Ford Transit van full-time for three years.

This sort of van life and meditation led to Theravada Buddhism and to the ancient (back to basics movement called the) Thai Forest Tradition, a Theravada Buddhist monastery in the UK.

During 2015, travelling the Buddhist Circuit, the holy sites in India, deep faith (saddha, confidence, conviction) reinforced a zeal for Buddhist ordination.

In 2020, after five years of intensive meditation practice between Thai Forest monasteries in Thailand and England, Dan was ordained in India, where he lived for three years, until returning to Thailand in 2023, and now living in Theravada Buddhist Sri Lanka.

Sabe Satta Sukhi Hontu. Please subscribe and be HAPPY, too. #englishmonk

Phra Dan, Bhante Dhammarakkhita, English Buddhist Monk (YouTube) July 12, 2023; Pat Macpherson and Dhr. Seven (eds.), Wisdom Quarterly

The Life of a Forest Monk (word free)

Monk Mode vs. 'Sicko Mode' Challenge

Buddhist nun (Sayalay Aloka, Burma) followed footsteps of brothers who took monk mode.

(Tasty Husbands) Cleveland hates pervert Glenn Quagmire for cheating with his wife on Family Guy

.

If he succeeds, I'll become a Buddhist nun.

I tried to spend a week eating healthily, meditating skillfully, reading wisely, and sweating profusely by running 5K [as tapas or "burning off" the bad by austerity] every day, all while ditching television completely, giving up social media scrolling, and turning my back and not touching alcohol at all.

I failed, but that didn’t stop it from changing my life.

Health trends are 10 a penny on TikTok, from the genuinely dangerous Gallon of Water a Day for 30 Days trend to the brutal 75 Hard Challenge and the ever-popular 12-3-20. And guys are more likely to be influenced into giving extreme ones a go more than women, according to a recent study.

• If only Doggone could write, we'd know all about it. He took a challenge with Ananda to "muscle" his way to meditation. Then he doesn't turn in his results write up.
• Male sex, high age, little physical exercise, and low levels of education are all associated with allostatic load

If I stare at this rock long enough...something?

I clearly am one of those gullible men. I wanted to throw myself headfirst into a new challenge. I've tried and failed any number of them. (Over lockdown, I stuck to the 100-pushup challenge for a little while).

But after hitting a bit of a slump at the start of the year, I wanted something that would jolt me out of it. I was exercising pretty regularly, but spending too long trapped in YouTube rabbit holes and not reading as much as I’d like. That’s where “monk mode” came in.

Going "monk mode" was far harder than I ever thought (iStock/Indy 100).

It was great living up at the Mt. Baldy Zen Center above LA as a Zen monk before music fame.

.

First Western Buddhist monk was Irish

It’s a pretty far-reaching term one sees bandied across the internet from time to time, and it can encompass any number of different elements.

There are some challenges listed, including ditching caffeine, which I was afraid to do, considering I was only doing monk mode for a week and had absolutely no intention of giving up my addiction to coffee in the long run, so it didn't make sense.

But in essence, monk mode involves dramatically cutting down screen time by placing a ban on drains like social media and TV. 

And it proved to be tough – tougher than I ever imagined it would be. The exercise part was by far the easiest part.

Monks East and West are different. Travel East.

I’m a regular runner anyway, and all it took was upping the level from three 5K runs a week to every day. 

It was a bit of a blessing that I went into monk mode after a relatively heavy weekend, which had involved plenty of Guinness [a type of addictive gluten alcohol the use of which is rampant in Ireland and parts of Europe] during a trip to Twickenham, so the no drinking wasn’t much of a problem either.

The challenge taught me a lot about my habit for procrastinating, though. I don’t think of myself as a social media addict, but I found my thumb unthinkingly heading for the Instagram app – out of boredom more than anything else – and I kept having to stop myself. More

"Sicko Mode" (rap rock metal cover)

(MaryJane Daniel) Here's our favorite rap metal/rock cover of "Sicko Mode"

Trip to America's stupidest city

(MindSquire) Stupidest city in US (Jackson, Mississippi) is full of Americans

• Harry Fletcher (indy100.com via MSN, 2/28/24); Tasty Husbands; MaryJane Daniel; Pat Macpherson, Dhr. Seven, Ananda (Dharma Buddhist Meditation), (eds.), Wisdom Quarterly; MindSquire

When the first celibate monk had sex

Academic researcher Achim Bayer, Dongguk University, Seoul (buddhismuskunde.uni-hamburg.de/pdf); Dhr. Seven, Ananda (DBM), Ashley Wells (eds.), Wisdom Quarterly

The Sudinna Tale in the Pāli Vinaya and Its Interpretation

Restraint of the eyes is good.

[Then the Buddhist monk Ven. Sudinna had sex with his ex-wife and was the first to commit such an offense which was not yet a specific violation of the Vinaya or Monastic Disciplinary Code.]

Filled with remorse (kukkucca), Sudinna returned to his fellow monks and confessed his deed. They scolded him harshly, and "then these monks, having rebuked Venerable Sudinna in various ways, told this matter to the Buddha."

The Buddha, after questioning Sudinna, again rebukes him in a similar way as the monks had done. Mocking Sudinna as a "foolish person" (moghapurisa), he tells him that what he has done is unfit (ananucchaviyam), disorderly (ananulomikam), unseemly (appanirūpam), not samana [wandering ascetic]-like (assāmanakam), unsuitable (akappiyam), and not to be done (akaranīyam).

"Why are you...unable to exert the supremely complete full ascetic behavior for as long as you live?" [9].

"Has not the Dhamma [Dharma] been taught by me in manifold ways in order to be free from passion (virāgāya), and not in order to have passion (sarāgāya)?" [10]. "How can you, O foolish person, when the Dhamma is taught by me in order to be free from passion, be intent on (cetessasi) having passion?" [11].

"The Dhamma has been taught for the sake of being without fetters (visamyogāya), being without attachment (anupādānāya)," and still, the Buddha says, Sudinna is intent on doing the opposite.

"The Dhamma has been taught to subdue haughtiness (madanimmadanāya) [12] and so on, for cessation (nirodhāya), and for nirvana. The abandoning of the sensual pleasures has been taught, and the calming of the fever of [craving for] sensual pleasures (kāmaparilāhāna), too.

It would be better if Sudinna (or any "foolish person") were to put (pakkhitta) his "specific organ [or limb]"  (angajāta) into the mouth of a venomous snake or a fire-pit rather than into the "specific organ" of womenfolk (mātugāmassa angajāte).

Why is that so? It is because with the former he will die or experience agony (maramamatta, vā dukkham, lit. "suffering as if dying"), but he will not go to hell [niraya, naraka, purgatory, perdition], to a lower realm [13]. But with the latter (i.e. sexual intercourse), he will go to hell, to the lower realms (niraya).

Through that karmic deed, Sudinna will enter (samāpajjissasi) upon the untrue dhamma (asaddhama), "village dhamma" (gāmadhamma), vile dhamma (vasaladhamma), badness (dutthulla), "what ends with ablution" (odakantika), secrecy (rahassa), "coming together of the two" (dvayamdvayasamāpatti) [14] ― Sudinna has just done the first of many unwholesome things [15].

Finally, the Buddha states ten reasons why sexual intercourse is forbidden for monastics, such as:

1. for the excellence of the Sangha (sanghasutthutāya),
2. for the comfort of the Sangha (sanghaphāsutāya),
3. for the suppression of badly confused persons (dumma puggalāna, niggahāya),
4. so that the well-behaved monastics may live with ease (pesalāna, bhikkhūna, phāsuvihārāya),
5. for restraining the inflows/defilements (āsavāna, samvarāya),
6. for the piety of those who are not pious (appasannāna, pasādāya),
7. so that those who are pious may increase (pasannāna, bhiyyobhāvāya),
8. so that the true Dhamma may be stable (saddhammatthitiyā),
9. for assistance in the vinaya (vinayānuggahāya) [16].
10. 
    

Thus the Buddha proclaims the prohibition of sexual intercourse for monastics, the transgression of which makes one liable to the state of asamvāsa, a loss of "fellowship or communion" with other members of his monastic community [17].

Interpretation of the Story

Hmm, what dos this story tell us?

THE PROHIBITION What, then, do the single elements of the narrative tell the reader? Ven. Sudinna himself is shown as not actively interested in sexual pleasure.

There is also no real danger that he would break away from the community: The agreement with his mother was clear, and for his part, Ven. Sudinna was ready to remain in the community as before [18].

From the point of view of lay ethics, there were no objections of caste, and the act happened with the

consent of his wife's superior in the family hierarchy, Ven. Sudinna's mother, who accepted the fact that Ven. Sudinna had neglected his duties as a husband and was intent on doing so in the future.

Therefore, I think the message of the story is as follows: Even if the conditions are highly favorable, even if there is apparently no harm to a third party, sexual intercourse is forbidden. That is to say, under no circumstances should any monastic have sexual intercourse or contact [19].

Soteriology: The liberation of the individual

Ven. Sudinna is accused of not having inferred the prohibition of sex from the fundamental precept of the Dhamma: moving away from sensual craving towards the cessation of sensual desire. That is, of course, a soteriological goal [20].

And indeed, celibacy fits in well with the general ascetic lifestyle, which consists of restraint of the senses for goals such as overcoming craving (tanhā, lit. "thirst") or the attainment of peace [21].

That being true, how does expulsion from the ascetic community fit in here? Does Ven. Sudinna's single transgression really endanger his ascetic lifestyle to such an extent that there is no hope for his return to his formerly exemplary monastic discipline? Is it really justified to truncate the career of a wandering ascetic such as Ven. Sudinna, giving him up as a hopeless case? More

Sex and monks and nuns (Monastic Rules)

Dhr. Seven, Ananda (eds.), Ven. Ariyesako, Monks' Rules: Laypeople Guide, Wisdom Quarterly

They have sex! They're hypocrites, liars, deceiving the world for minimal gains. We knew it!

.

(II) Relationships

It's hard not to stare when you're still only human.

Buddhist monastics cannot live in complete isolation from laypeople, for their mutually supportive relationship is intrinsic to the monastic way of life.

However, it should never become an intimate or sexual relationship, for that would go against the whole purpose of leaving behind the "family or household life" with its endless "closed in" complications [43],

The "supreme life" (brahmacariya) is one that checks the display of any form of erotic desire through the actions, speech, and thoughts of a monastic. In fact, restraint from gross sexual misconduct is already part of the Five Precepts. [See Note 4].

The Eight Precepts as well as the Ten Precepts immediately refine this then the Monastic Disciplinary Code (Vinaya) manages it with even greater subtlety. One's Dharma life can then advance toward the letting go of all craving through development of the heart/mind through meditation (cultivation).

The most potent object for strong sexual craving, which the mind/heart is pining for and grasping after, is usually associated with the other sex. Therefore, many rules involve this relationship [44].

Sexual intercourse

Transgender "monk" in Tibet

The first offense of the 227 listed major rules of the Rules Recitation (Patimokkha) concerns a monastic engaging in sexual intercourse.

It is a hot issue, perhaps more today than before, going by the number of sex scandals that rock the Buddhist world in the East and West. Ven. Thiradhammo writes:

"While some of the guidelines may seem somewhat rigid or prudish, it is important to reflect upon the volatility and durability of rumor, even if untrue. The incessant sex-scandals in religious circles may provide a sufficient incentive to encourage the greatest measure of prevention and discretion" (HS, Chp.13).

The rule of celibacy (chastity) was originally laid down because of rich Ven. Sudinna. He was the son of a rich merchant, who left home to become a wandering ascetic (Buddhist monastic) only after great opposition from his family. He went away to practice Dharma, and when he came back to visit, his parents were overjoyed to see him.

So they plotted to lure him back into the lay life again. They invited him for a meal then laid out their wealth in front of him, piled up in two huge heaps of gold, while the wife he had left behind dressed herself in her most irresistibly alluring way.

Ven. Sudinna remained unmoved by all of this. After telling them to throw the gold away in the river, he referred to his former wife as "sister."

Nevertheless, when his elderly mother pleaded with him at least to give them a grandson and heir, he foolishly gave in. He had sexual intercourse with his former wife.

This first defeat offense is summarized: "A monastic who engages in any form of sexual intercourse [penetration] is defeated" (Parajika 1, BMC, p. 45).

Every form and variety of sexual intercourse with sexual penetration — be it genital, oral, or anal, whether with a female, male, or animal — is forbidden. The penalty is the heaviest one of defeat (parajika).

Intimacy — touching

I can't believe that hypocrite touched me.

The modern West is full of stories of sexual harassment. The ways the Buddha dealt with such matters should therefore not seem very strange.

If a monastic touches a person in a sexual way, one commits a very serious offense requiring formal meetings of the Monastic Community (sangha) and probation (sangha-disesa).]

The scrupulous monastic wants to remain above suspicion so, if able, will avoid all physical contact.

Hence monk's and nun's attitude toward shaking hands is to avoid them. Or if one wishes to avoid offending, because it is a warm social custom, they are kept brief. This also explains why, at least in Thailand, a receiving cloth is used to receive offerings from females. (See EN 85).

Buddhist monks are not alone in this. Catholics.

The rule was first set down by the Buddha after a Brahmin and his wife had gone to inspect Ven. Udayin's fine dwelling. [See Udāyī (2).] As Ven. Udayin was showing them around, he came up behind the lady and "rubbed up against her limb by limb."

After they had left the husband praised Ven. Udayin, but the wife was critical and explained what had happened. The Brahmin then complained, "Isn't it even possible to take one's wife to a monastery without her being molested?" This rule was then set down:

"Should any monastic overcome by lust, with altered mind, engage in bodily contact with a woman, or in holding her hand, holding a lock of her hair, or caressing any of her limbs, it entails initial and subsequent meetings of the Monastic Community" (Sanghadisesa 2, BMC, p. 100).

To be at fault the monastic must usually do some action to bring himself in contact with a female as lust overcomes his mind [45]. If he accidentally stumbles and bumps into a female, or vice-versa, or if he is accosted by one, as long as there is no intention to come into lustful contact with her, there is no offense.

However, the average monastic's mind tends to be so quick and unruly — for one is, after all, still in training and therefore not yet enlightened — that one may prefer to be super-cautious about such situations.

If a monastic touches his mother out of affection, this is still an offense but the lesser one of wrong-doing (dukkata) [46]. While gratitude to parents was strongly emphasized by the Buddha, the monastic having left the home-life and family should not cling to worldly relationships.

The only true way to fulfill one's filial obligations is by gaining insight into the Dharma and then teaching one's parents.

If a monastic is acting with lustful intentions, one incurs a grave (thullaccaya) offense for making bodily contact with a pandaka ("sex-aberrant") [homosexual, deviant, pervert, transgender, transsexual, prostitute, or eunuch] and an offense of wrong-doing for sexual contact with a male. (See BMC, p. 103).

The previous rules dealt with the monastic's physical actions. The next two rules are offenses — again of the very serious category — that concern his wrong speech towards females.

Flirting

Are you still a monk? - That was just temporary.

This rule came into being when many female visitors came together to look over Ven. Udayin's dwelling. He spoke to them in a lewd, flirtatious way so that some of them said, "It is improper. Even from our husbands we wouldn't like to hear this sort of thing." Therefore, the Buddha laid down this rule:

"Should any monastic, overcome by lust, with altered mind, address lewd words to a female in the manner of young men to a young woman alluding to sexual intercourse, it entails initial and subsequent meetings of the Monastic Community" (Sangh. 3, BMC, p. 110).

Propositioning

The following rule is very relevant today when some misguidedly believe that submitting to sex with spiritual teachers can help in their spiritual development.

Again, it was originally a lustful Ven. Udayin who was the cause of this offense. This time, he suggested to a beautiful and devout female follower that she make a "special offering" to him, that of sexual intercourse. The Buddha then set forth this rule:

"Telling a female that she would benefit from having sexual intercourse with oneself is [an offense requiring initial and subsequent meetings of the Monastic Community]." (Summary [47] Sangh. 4, BMC, p. 117). More

What do Buddhist monks do? (video)

Nick Keomahavong; Dhr. Seven, Ashley Wells (eds.), Wisdom Quarterly

Who are monks and what do they do?

(A Life of a Buddhist Monk Documentary, April 25, 2019)

Buddhist monks need to be calm and serious.

Buddhist monastics (bhikkhus and bhikkhunis, monks and nuns) are shrouded in mystery, but there is no reason for this. They are open and approachable. Let's not bother them. Let's take a look at them behind-the-scenes.

They are secluded, almost invisible, hidden from the Western world. This short documentary is an attempt to allow a brief glimpse into the life of a monk (life being similar but harder for female ascetics) and a look into a monastery.

Tudong novices in Northeast forest tradition

The monk's life may be misunderstood by many, so this video gives us an exclusive look into that world. It answers questions like, Why monks do the things they do, why does anyone ordain, and how does one train oneself?

Speaking from first-hand experience, the monk's training and monk's life are NOT easy. No self-development is easy. Making a commitment to a disciplined regular practice is NOT easy. But that said, each day we continue to make a choice to pursue this path to enlightenment.

Enjoy this look into a private and exclusive life of self-development. Please feel free to leave thoughts in the comments' section.

Interested in ordaining through the International Dhammakayada Ordination Program (IDOP)? Download a free guide below. Apply online at ordinationthai.org.

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IDOP: What is the Ordination Program?

The International Dhammakayada Ordination Program, or IDOP, gives individuals the opportunity to become temporarily ordained Buddhist monks. The temple is located at Wat Phra Dhammakaya, the world’s largest Buddhist temple in Pathum Thani, Thailand. This is approximately one hour from Bangkok near the international airport. The address is 40 Mu 8, Khlong Song, Khlong Luang Patumthani 12120, Thailand.

Why ordain at Dhammakaya?

They ordain at Dhammakaya for many different reasons, essentially to have an authentic experience of life as a Buddhist monk in an environment that preserves the 2,600-year history of monastic life in the Buddhist sangha. “Peace is the essence of happiness, and that essence is the true nature of all beings.” The benefit of training as a monk in IDOP is the effect of experiencing the inner essence and peace that exists in all human beings through the practice of Dhammakaya meditation.

Loss and Laughter: Becoming Wise (audio)

Ashley Wells, Dhr. Seven, Wisdom Quarterly; Krista Tippett (OnBeing.org, May 19, 2016)

"This week, on 'The Amazing Race to Enlightenment,' can Jim and Suzy achieve right mindfulness? And will Barb and Candy be eliminated for relentless clinging to the self?" W

The Big Question: Does My Life Have Meaning? (Parker J. Palmer) Trying to answer the existential question of life's worth is inevitable but flawed. With words from Czeslaw Milosz as guide, a look at the question we need not answer and the ultimate definition of love.

  

The Problematic Idea of Success After a lifetime of learning and loving and losing, here are a few -- five, to be precise -- practical lessons to you and recent college graduates about what it means to lead a successful life.

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Death Is Stupid, and Other Lessons Children Teach Us About the Inevitable End Using a children's book on death as scaffolding, a case can be made for kids teaching adults how to work through grief and death better.

 

• AUDIO: play episode (iTunes) - download MP3
• Get Published on On Being and/or Becoming Wise

The Losses and Laughter We Grow Into (Krista Tippett) Kevin Kling is part funny guy, part poet, part playwright, and part wise man. A treasured figure on the national storytelling circuit, his voice inhabits an unusual space -- where a homegrown Minnesota wit meets Dante and Shakespeare. Born with a disabled left arm, he lost the use of his right one after a motorcycle accident nearly killed him. He shares his special angle on life's humor and its raptures -- and why we turn loss into story. More

• Poetry Radio Project: archive of poets and poetry heard on the show, from Wendell Berry to Mary Oliver, Rilke to Rumi
• The Disease of Being Busy

Krista Tippett's new book: Becoming Wise: An Inquiry into the Mystery and Art of Living. Her U.S. tour will stop in 12 cities, including Minneapolis/St. Paul, Chicago, Austin, St. Louis, Tulsa, New York, Washington, D.C., Los Angeles, San Francisco, and Portland. And check out the new podcast, Becoming Wise!

Why become a Buddhist ascetic? (King Milinda)

Amber Larson and Dhr. Seven, Wisdom Quarterly, "The Questions of King Milinda" [Menander] (Miln), Milindapañha (as.miami.edu/phi/bio/Buddha/Milinda)

Indo-Greco art from Mes Aynak ("Copper Well"), Afghanistan (irtiqa-blog.com)

 

Lay Life vs. Monasticism

Greek King Milinda (Menander 1) coin

King Milinda (Greek, Menander) asked the Buddhist sage: "Venerable Nagasena, the Blessed One has said:
 
"‘Right spiritual progress is praiseworthy for householders and wandering ascetics alike. Both householders and wandering ascetics, when progressing rightly, can accomplish, because of their right progress, the right method, the Dharma, which is wholesome.’ 

"If, Nagasena, a householder, dressed in white, enjoying the pleasures of the senses, inhabiting a house overcrowded with spouse and family, using fragrant sandalwood of Benares, as well as garlands, perfumes, and creams, owning gold and silver, wearing a turban ornamented with gold and jewels, can, if s/he progresses rightly, accomplish the right method, the Dharma, the wholesome, and if a wandering ascetic, bald-headed, clad in saffron robe, dependent on alms offerings for a livelihood, careful to fulfil correctly the four sections of monastic virtue, submitting to the 150 path-to-liberation (pratimoksa) rules, and observing all 13 Sane Ascetic Practices (dhutanga), without omitting any, can also, if progressing rightly, accomplish the right method, the Dharma, the wholesome -- then, venerable sir, What is the difference between the householder and the wandering ascetic? 

 

"Fruitless is your austerity, useless is the homeless (wandering ascetic) life, barren is the observation of the monastic rules, in vain do you observe the sane ascetic practices! What is the use of inflicting pain upon yourself if you can gain nirvana while remaining at ease?"

UCLA: Save Buddhist-Afghan site (WQ)

Nagasena replied: "You have quoted the Blessed One's words correctly, your majesty. To make right progress is indeed the most excellent thing of all.

"And if the wandering ascetic, in the consciousness of being a wandering ascetic, should fail to progress rightly, then one would be far from the state of an ascetic, far from a supreme life. Still more so would that apply to a householder dressed in white.

"But both the householder and the wandering ascetic are alike in that, when they progress rightly, they accomplish the right method, the Dharma, the wholesome.

Wish-fulfilling gem

"Nevertheless, your majesty, it is the wandering ascetic who is the master of the pure life. To be a wandering ascetic has many and numerous, even infinite, virtues (benefits). To measure the virtues of being a wandering ascetic is not at all possible. It is like a [chintamani] jewel that fulfills all one's wishes; one cannot measure its value in terms of money and say that it is worth so much.

 

Like the waves in the great ocean, one cannot measure and say that there are so many. All that the wandering ascetic still has to do, one succeeds in doing rapidly and without taking a long time over it. And why is that? It is because the wandering ascetic, your majesty, is content with little, easily pleased, secluded from the world, not addicted to society, energetic, independent, solitary, perfect in conduct, austere in practice, skilled in all that concerns inner purification and spiritual progress.

 

Beautiful Buddhist jewelry recovered from the Mes Aynak monastic complex/town archeological site, Afghanistan, suggesting that beauty, baubles, and sensual delights were quite popular. Treasure dated from 500 AD to 700 AD (Kadir/Salam Viking).

 

Such a person is like your javelin, your majesty -- smooth, even, well polished, straight, clean, and shining. When it is well thrown, it will fly exactly as you want it to. In the same way, whatever the wandering ascetic still has to do, one succeeds in doing it all rapidly and without taking a long time over it."

 

"Well spoken, Nagasena. So it is, and so I accept it."

Nagasena continued: "In any case, your majesty, all those who as householders, living in a home and in the enjoyment of sensual pleasures, realize the peace of nirvana, the highest good, they have all been trained in former lives in the 13 Sane Ascetic Practices peculiar to [Buddhist monastic] disciples, and through them they have laid the foundations for their present realization and attainment. It is because they had purified their conduct and behavior by means of them then that now even as householders, living in a home and in the enjoyment of sense pleasures, they can realize the peace of nirvana, the highest good.

Child plays with novice monk, Leh, Ladakh, Buddhist India (Vincenzo Rossi/flickr.com)

 

House or Monastery? 

Bad dog! Check your motives.

"But whoever enters the Monastic Order bad motives -- from covetousness, deceitfully, out of greed and gluttony, desirous of gain, fame, or reputation, unsuitably, unqualified, unfit, unworthy, unseemly -- that person shall incur a twofold comeuppance, which will prove ruinous to all one's good qualities.

In this very life, one shall be scorned, derided, reproached, ridiculed, and mocked. One shall be shunned, expelled, ejected, removed, and banished. 

What could account for Sam winning the "Ugliest Dog in the World" contest? (EIT)

  

Aw, poor baby! (ugliest dog in the world)

In the next life, like foam which is tossed about, up and down and across, one shall cook for many hundreds of thousands of aeons (kalpas, which also be interpreted as meaning "ordinary lifespans") in the great Waveless Deep (Avici) hell, which is a hundred leagues big, and all ablaze with hot, scorching, fierce, and fiery flames. 

"And when one has been released thence, one's entire body will become emaciated, rough, and black, one's head swollen, bloated and full of holes. 

As hungry as a ghost or preta (WP)

Hungry and thirsty, disagreeable and dreadful to look at, one's ears all torn, eyes constantly blinking, entire body one putrid mass of sores, dense with maggots, bowels afire and blazing like a mass of fire fanned by a breeze, helpless and unprotected, weeping, crying, wailing, and lamenting, consumed by unsatisfied longings -- that person who once was a religious wanderer shall then as a large hungry ghost roam about on the earth bewailing that fate.
 

"But if, on the other hand, a person enters the Monastic Order (Sangha) suitably, qualified, fit, worthy and seemly, content with little, easily pleased, secluded (withdrawing and protecting the senses) from the worldly, not addicted to society, energetic and resolute, without fraud or deceit, not gluttonous, not desirous of gain, fame, or reputation, devout and with confidence (saddha, faith), out of a desire to free oneself from old age and death and to uphold the Buddha's dispensation (sasana), then one deserves to be honored in two ways, by both devas and humans.

 

The devas find one dear (wallpaper.365greetings.com)

  

Beauty pageant

"One is dear and pleasing to them. They love and seek after one. One is to them as fine jasmine flowers are to a person bathed and anointed with oil, or good food to the hungry, or a cool, clear, and fragrant drink to the thirsty, or an effective medicine [antidote] to those who are poisoned, or a superb chariot drawn by thoroughbreds to those who want to travel quickly, or a wish-fulfilling jewel to those who want to enrich themselves, or a brilliantly white parasol, the [spaceship-like] emblem of royalty, to those who would like to be rulers, or as the supreme attainment of the fruit of enlightenment (arhatship) to those who wish for Dharma.

The 37 Requisites of Enlightenment

 "In that person

• The Four Foundations (Posts or Pillars) of Mindfulness reach their full development, as do
• The Four Right Efforts,
• The Four Roads to [Psychic] Success,
• The Five Faculties,
• The Five Powers,
• The Seven Factors of Enlightenment, and
• The Noble Eightfold Path.

"One attains to calm and insight, and one's progressive attainments continue to mature, and one becomes a repository of the Four Fruits of the Spiritual Life (Samana Phala), of the Four Analytical Knowledges, the Threefold Knowledge, and the Six Super Knowledges, in short, of the whole Dharma of the spiritual life, and one is consecrated with the brilliantly white parasol of emancipation." More