The Tail that Wags the Dog: DSM-5 (cartoon)

Editors, Wisdom Quarterly (REVIEW); BarnesandNoble.com

Better living through poison and pricey pharmaceutical-grade chemicals (weheartit.com)

DSM-5 is the most comprehensive and current resource for rich mental health clinicians.

 

BAD: Yohimbe, cannabis, rock 'n roll...

There is a new edition of the American Psychiatric Association's Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM-5). It is used by clinicians and researchers to diagnose and classify mental disorders.

But its main function has become a means of getting insurance companies to pay for outlandish pharmaceutical treatments for ALL kinds of things.

You're CRAZY if we vote and say that behavior is an official "disorder" included in the APA Bible, the manual used to diagnose who is and isn't bonkers. Homer Simpson found out when he asked, found out how it is decided just who is "INSANE" and who is not. The diagnosis was actually quite elegant.

(FOX TV) Homer and Michael Jackson institutionalized for being different

GOOD: Viagra, Valium, and harp Musak...

This new revision, fifth in the bestselling series, is the product of more than 10 years of effort by hundreds of international "experts" in all aspects of mental health -- not least of which is getting paid, and making a maximum profit with the help of drug peddlers (Big Pharma agents, not the grimy kind in suburban schools and flashy clubs). 

 

Their dedication and hard work have yielded an "authoritative" volume you can take to your school official (any counselor, nurse, occupational or rehabilitation therapists, social workers, forensic, and legal specialists) and demand Ritalin or other pharmaceutical-grade forms of speed and horse, super-addictive amphetamines and narcotics of all kinds.

DSM-5 defines and classifies "mental disorders" in order to [maximize and] improve diagnoses, treatment (never profit-stifling "cures," only "ongoing treatments"), and research.

 

This manual, which itself is an excellent sedative for those suffering from insomnia, makes not only for a  good snooze read, but also creates a common language for clinicians involved in the diagnosis of mental disorders.

It includes concise and specific criteria intended to facilitate an objective assessment of symptom presentations in a variety of clinical settings -- inpatient, outpatient, partial hospital, consultation-liaison, clinical, private practice, and primary care. So what could be wrong with that?

The problem, at least one of them, is that it implies that these are naturally-occurring illnesses existing in nature, merely being defined by science. The book is the tail that wags the dog. The dog is the pharmaceutical industry, which uses the DSM as a justification for medicating every and any "aberrant," disruptive, or simply inconvenient behavior.

Mmm, Prozac-flavored icing (fluoride)

Any? Yes, any, because there are many "off label" uses for drugs that make them particularly good moneymakers for corporation that manufacture them. Unless, that is, they actually work. One old patented drug was discovered to cure cancer. No one wants to cure cancer; cancer treatments make too much money for everyone involved -- poison makers (look up pharmakos), radiation promoters, wig makers, hospices, hospitals, surgeons, chemotherapists who attempt to poison parts of the body to death without killing the whole body in the process, fast food makers, and so on.

 
The information contained in the manual is valuable to right-thinking physicians and health professionals, not just psychologists.
 
At $149.00 plus tax, DSM-5 is the most profitable and definitive resource for the diagnosis and classification of mental disorders. Oh, and remember to renew your American Psychiatric Association membership dues; we take them and make more money for you until we're all happy. And keep this review under your hat, NOT for release to the general public. Buy your copy today! (No refunds).

• "Dumbass" (Ai Weiwei's heavy metal protest video)