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| It's not about wearing the latest fashions but about having enough empathy to "read minds." |
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| There are Four Bases of Popularity |
The secret of the popular kids: Researchers find "mind reading" abilities make children more likeable. The research looked at 20 separate studies involving 2,096 children.
Empathy [feeling others' feelings with them, what the Buddha referred to as mudita, "empathetic joy," "happiness in others' happiness"] was the common factor in making and maintaining friendships. This is especially true for girls, whose friendships usually involve more intimacy. |
| "Wipe your butt, Stinky." (The Rut) |
It's not about wearing the latest fashion or being on the football team; the secret to being popular at school is "mind reading." This is according to an Australian study that found popular children are better at knowing what others want, think, and feel.
The same goes for pre-schoolers and young adults, suggesting that empathy is one of the most important skills for becoming part of the "cool crowd."
"Our study suggests that understanding others' mental perspectives may facilitate the kind of interactions that help children become or remain popular," said Virginia Slaughter, professor of psychology at the University of Queensland.
The ability to find out what other people are thinking and feeling is called "theory of the mind" and helps people distinguish, for instance, between sarcasm and insult.
While individual studies have shown an association with popularity in the past, this research looked across the findings of 20 different studies.
Together, the studies included 2,096 children from 2 to 10 years old from Asia, Australia, Europe, and North America. More
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