Wisdom Quarterly: American Buddhist Journal: I quit Catholicism to save my mental health

Thursday, June 2, 2016

I quit Catholicism to save my mental health

Nneka M. Okona (Revelist via Huff Post, May 31, 2016); Pat Macpherson, Wisdom Quarterly
() WARNING: Graphic testimony of Catholic nun! Vatican's Dark Secrets Exposed

(April 6, 2015) Shocking testimony of ex-Roman Catholic nun Sister Charletta and the atrocities and ritual sexual abuse she experienced at the hands of the wicked and barbaric priests of the Roman Catholic "Whore of Babylon" (spreaker.com)

How Quitting Catholicism Helped Me Get the Mental Health Treatment I Needed

Thank God I got out of God's House.

I learned at a young age that obedience to God is the key to a great life.

My family raised me as a non-denominational Christian, though we attended an A.M.E. church and later converted to Catholicism.

My earliest memories are littered with reading, musing about life in a notebook hidden underneath my mattress, and church, lots of church.

I was always in church, not just Sunday services. Fellowship afterward eating fried birds, cornbread, collards, an assortment of cakes and pies was a must.

Sunday school, Wednesday evening Bible study, Saturday afternoon activities. Church, school, and home were the three places my presence was mandated.

These were the supposed keys to leading a good life, a life in which I was happy, not just spiritually, but mentally, emotionally, and psychologically, too.

Your idols died for you...so feel guilty.

I fell in line without questioning anything because I wanted the happiness this life promised.

Church was at the hands of my mother, whose devout faith stems from her southern Baptist upbringing in Huntsville, Alabama. Even though she’s a spiritual mother, she is not nurturing or well-equipped to parent the emotionally sensitive person I am.

When I came to her for advice, her answer always involved a variation of "Everything happens for a reason" and "It’s time to pray." She also told me to make sure I diligently read my Bible, attended, church regularly, and faithfully tithed my 10% [of my money to the church]....

I stopped going to church

I stopped attending church around the fall of 2012. I lived without the restraint of religiosity choking me for two years, which coincided with an international move to Madrid, Spain, to teach English. It felt like freedom, but it also felt incredibly empty. I prayed very little those two years although I never stopped believing in God.....

Meditation

Christine Turlington (Vanity Fair)

I started meditating every morning and experimenting with other meditative states and practices.

From there, I researched crystals, as per the recommendation of a friend who had a large collection and bought my first ones -- citrine, green quartz, black obsidian. I felt really good. Great even for the first time in a long time. But eventually this blissful state wore off.

Depression

Depression first kills the will to resist it.

I went into a defensive fit of rage when my father suggested I was depressed. I couldn’t be depressed. I prayed. I meditated. I repeated my positive affirmations.

I even read certain passages of Marianne Williamson’s A Return to Love and Louise Hay’s You Can Heal Your Life in tandem almost every day. I was doing the hard inner-work every single day. So how could I be depressed?

I began to blame myself. My outer-world was reflecting my inner-world, so I had the power to shift it. Yes. This was on me. More