Tuesday, February 21, 2012

How To Set Yourself On Fire

I. Rony ("How To Burn Yourself"), Wisdom Quarterly
An 18-year-old is latest Tibetan to self-immolate. Nangdrol committed suicide by fire at 2:00 pm on Feb. 19, 2012 near Jonang Dzamthang Monastery, Tibet.

LHASA, China (Occupied Tibet) - Thinking of setting yourself on fire for the glory of peaceful Buddhism? Good. That ought to teach those violent Chinese not to abuse the native people of the plateau. Burn yourself, burn the other. A monk in Vietnam protesting Americans in the 1960s showed us how.
  • Step 1. Bring some gasoline. Avoid BP brand. Because the first precept is being violated, bring some alcohol too to violate the fifth. It was good enough for His Holiness Milarepa. Shakyamuni didn't understand what it was like to live with rivals trying to restrict his freedom of religion.
  • Step 2. Bring some matches, no, a lighter, no-no, a long fireplace lighter so as to not burn your fingers; if all goes well, they'll be on fire soon enough.

Tibetan nun gets in on the act setting herself on fire for the anti-Chinese cause

  • Step 3. Bring a picture of His Holiness the 14th Dalai Lama or at least His Holiness the 17th Karmapa, or better yet the new Panchen Lama or that fake Chinese "Karmapa," to stick it to remorseful communist soldiers with the sharp poker of irony.
  • Step 4. Bring a strong meditation practice. Pain like this is going to take the fourth samtem, which has transcended both pleasure and pain, to overcome. This could take a while, but three years, three months, three days, and three hours isolated in a dark Himalayan cave should be plenty.
  • Step 5. Bring a map or a crowd so the self-immolation can take place front and center at an intersection (crossroads), near a monument or army check post. No, scratch that. Call the media and as them where they prefer, then wait for a cameraman to arrive.
After that, let nature take its course. Get ready to meet Ksitigarbha.* And viola! Pacifist in a charred silky saffron sauce chalks one up for Mahayana martyrdom with a Vajrayana twist. By stepping up to the crucifixion/immolation site as the sacrificial lamb serving itself up as chops, this should please the great God in Beijing.

It is rumored that Saint Issa went out this way before returning to Hemis Gompa. We have to show Muslim peace activists, jilted Pakistani lovers, and Indian widows how it's done. Long live the Dharma, freedom of religion (except that controversial Shugden movement), the (cultural) revolution, and our peaceful way of life unmolested by Han intervention.
"Earth Treasury" Vows and Hell
KSITIGARBHA is known for his vow to save all beings within the six worlds [that comprise just the Sense Sphere]. Between the time of the Buddha Gautama and the Buddha Maitreya, he vows not to achieve buddhahood until all the beings in the hells are freed. He is therefore often regarded as "the bodhisattva of hell beings," the guardian of children, the patron deity of deceased children and aborted fetuses in Japanese culture. Usually depicted as a Buddhist monk with a nimbus around his shaved head, he carries a staff to force open the gates of hell and a wish-fulfilling jewel to light up the darkness.

Will the real Karmapa please stand up

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